We're Born With Blood. We're Born With Rage. (Our New World)

                                        We're Born With Blood. We're Born With Rage. (Our New World)
                                                                             by Mark William Darus

                                                               
                                           
                           Yesterday, on my way to work, I was looking for music software at Best Buy at Westfields Great Northern Mall, North Olmsted Ohio, USA. I happened to venture into the laptop section and hit the NET. First thing that popped up was about yet another Shopping mall shooting.

                      Nice. I mean, don't we find comfort in the normal day to day happenings that help us feel grateful to merely be alive? Hearing of this event on a car radio, seeing a commercial blurb about it on TV and how there would be film at some point, catching it like a starving fisherman as something tugs on your line on the internet. Did a neighbor, coworker, stranger, member of the clergy share this latest event in passing?

                      Did this catch you, take momentarily hold of your thoughts , knowing it a weekend and wondering if your children,  loved ones, charges were going to roam the local Mall to kill nothing more than simple time amongst others like minded as you as were doing a Saturdays weeks worth of laundry?

                       Did you, let  your over-stuffed  McDonalds laden gut sodium scented belch out as your vehicle reaches an intersection that slow moving traffic makes you wish you had a gun to speed things up a wee bit?

                        Were you sitting alone at a Starbucks, surrounded by others very much self-guarded/shielded like your hiding self, while vibrant Jazz blaring as succulent whiffs of rich coffee blends mix with diabetic hells of amazing pastries  with your Lappy, IPAD, and the like when this news hit?

                     What did you feel within as your chilled winter ears captured unkind information?

                     Did you think about what this world is coming to?

                      Hearing this, did you clutch your mate close to you? Inhaling their scent into you, as your mind swirls like a carnival ride gone berzerk, tugging them closer, placing a hand on their chest to feel security of a wanting, beating heart against you?

                      Perhaps you had the product of you and your husbands loving look at you and ask, with pigtails splashing to the right and left, pure innocents in young and tiny impression, why does this happen?

                     

                     I asked over two dozen people about America's (and i have little doubt will  be eclipsed in a week or two, sadly so) killing fields being schools, movies and Malls in the last 50 hours.

                        The following is what I was given when I asked them what they FELT about it. Filling my Trailblazer at a gas station sharing across ther pumps throbbings, getting coffee from various venues with chit chat though eyes met square, shopping at walmart  in check-outs with video monitors that carry no audio,  eating at a two restaurants.



                           At Best Buy:

                    Me: Damn, another Mall shooting? Maryland.
                     Worker: Sad. Dead?
                     Me: 2  so far.
                    Worker; could be worse, right?
                     Me: This is occuring now.
                      Worker: Sad. (he pauses about two/three seconds, adding about the current sales end soon and how I should take advantage of them.
                    Me: oh. yeah. I should do that. Hmmm, does you girlfriend work at a mall?
                     Worker: She sure does! I soooo love her! She works at an ear piercing kiosk, She's amazing-
                      Me: cutting him off. So she could next in the line of fire, right?
                     Worker: Uh, sir, I, I- am so sorry... (I had caught him off guard, clearly so.)
                       Me: It's okay, man. Just take a moment, call her and tell her how much you love her.
                      Worker: Do you think something like might happen in Ohio?
                       Me: Well, do you think the people of Maryland woke this morning thinking it would happen there?
                      Worker: (his eyes bulged, breathing increased,) DAMN!
                       Me: Hey, I don't mean to frighten you. I'm just saying time is precious and fast moving.  In days like these we need to band together, not under a flag of nations but one of love, understanding and comfort.
                        Worker: Dude, what church do you go to?
                         Me: I don't have one. I have searched a very long time and keep failing. Oh well. I keep looking though.
                         Worker: I'm gonna call my girlfriend, could you excuse me?
                          Me: Absolutely! Be not afraid. Things happen as they do. Peace be your journey, brother.



                    At a Walmart while doing duty shoving a squeaking cart about. In the candle and incense area, feeling my oats and splashing myself out there like a megaphone in a maternity ward, i gained these after saying: Several dead in a Westfields Mall in Maryland. Any care to share your thoughts?

                    "They must have needed a good deading, m'boy. Jesus doesn't call his kin home without dem earnin'  it. Praise God!" a man sporting a low-end T-shirts fading glory stating: KILL 'EM ALL! and baggy camo-shorts proclaimed.

                     "It's tragic, to say the least. Our world is slipping sideways, sir. I fear our children are more predatory than us. They desire so much and never wish to do honest work to gain anything. I have grandbabies in their late teens. Fired from this Mcdonalds, that Burger King and the lot. High school dropouts, the lot of them. I'm sorry, honey. I'm old and just go on and on and on..."  She looked so frail, Her grey locks tossed over heavily wrinkled face that had witnessed so much in her life.  She was sniffing a blue coloured Ocean Sea-breeze candle as she finished with: "Young man, thank you. I think I need to call my children now. Tell them I love them no matter how badly they could have done better in their lives. What church do you attend?"
                  I told her I appreciated her thanks. I also told her I had no church I called HOME.
                   "Sweet child, I watched you. What did you feel as you heard the news you ask us?"
                   Respecting elders, I told her that I wasn't sure. In all honesty, I truly didn't know. Yeah, how emotionally dead am i, really?  Gave her my truth though adding: "Sweetest, you might want to not add the "how badly they could have done better" part. "do as you will, but to me, is that how Christ would have you speak to them?"
                    She hugged me as another responded most loudly.

                       '"Fuck you, bitch. WHERE BE SHIT PAY-PERZZZ, HOMO CUNT!" a heavily bearded male spoke to a lady clad in a burka (sp? Islamic garb)

                       "SAD, yet a common aspect of life. People walk in front of that which kills them. People die this way. Better them than me, " a highly thin blond lady laden with more gold jewelry than her total body weight seethed through gritting teeth.  I liked her coral dress design. Most colourful.  She was smiling as she spoke.

                       "YOU GET ANY CLOSER TO ME AND MY KIDS AND I WILL KILL YOU! "  a misty blond haired lady in a bright blue tank top with short-short blue Levi's chopped down  said as she quickly gathered two toddlers under her winged arms, pulling them to her as she covered yet  a small babe in carriage.

                       "No offense intended." I softly spoke, adding: "I so applaud the way you protect your kinder. And, yeah, I have little doubt you would kill me."
               
                      "Okay, you gonna leave this isle, mister?"  her dark brown eyes meeting mine fully, squaring off, Instinctive things making her react within her.
               
                       "Yes. You are a good mother and never doubt that while most of your friends do." I backed myself  and my pisspoor  shopping cart which sounded like a baby seal being clubbed to death by hungry Russians.

                       "DAMN, WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT NOISE?!?!" she asked. Her slender hand dove into her over shoulder Gucci-clone satchel.

                        I looked at her, her tiny  children gazing toward her, their faces taken into my memory while backing up, and proclaimed: "This shopping cart is either a result of bad American engineering or the Univeral work L Ron Hubert's  Dianetics! Either way, this thing is possessed and making me  think of Eskimos doing their thing for survival. SORRY!" i smiled all the while, and this seemed to work for her.

                                      But another gave his mind to me.

                                    An awesome three-piece, custom made dashing grey suit, red shirt and black and white patterned tie spoke up as i backed off the candle isle.   This person spoke softly in a voice so cold and devoid of emotions I developed GooseFlesh on my limbs. Giving me a truth to consider,  I felt the tiny hairs on the back of my neck rise giving instinctual warning signs.  "Why shouldn't they be dead? Clearly someone has an agenda, No? Are you really so naive  to believe this days shootings such as these are random? Columbine, Chardon, Colorado Opening of a Batman movie. Have you written have you learned nothing at all?  It's part of an Order that will be followed by many more horrific things. You are not so ignorant to not know this already."

                           As she continued, I listened, never dropping my eyes from hers. I am not sure how I managed to do this. Perhaps the power of God, Christ, my Frodo-dog. No clue. I just knew I had to keep my eye contact with her.

                         "I;m damned ignorant! Seriously so!" i managed.

                         "Mark,  just do as you do, keep writing and sharing a Word from long ago with as many as you can and all will be as it should." she smiled as she spoke, long brunette hair running over shoulders.

                          "


                              E'nuff said on that one. I have never seen eyes so deadly with the purest of meaning aimed at me. This is an amazing woman.



                              What would you share?

                            Mark William DArus


                         

                           
                       

                   

                       

PSYCHOPATHY: ANOTHER LIFE. A Personal Awakening.: Another Cinema Shooting! Are These Events THE Next...

PSYCHOPATHY: ANOTHER LIFE. A Personal Awakening.: Another Cinema Shooting! Are These Events THE Next...:                                                Another Cinema Shooting! Are These Events the Next Craze in the USA?                     ...

Another Cinema Shooting! Are These Events THE Next School Shooting Craze?

                                               Another Cinema Shooting! Are These Events the Next Craze in the USA?
                                                                                       by
                                                                           Mark William Darus.

                                     Here's what we know thus far:

                                     People are at a cinema to watch a movie. Some jerk is texting his 3 year old daughter during the movie previews. A 71 year old retired Police Chief is offended and asks the man, two rows away, to cut it out. Apparently, the guy didn't listen to him very well.

                                     He should have.

                                 "B-B-B-B-B-B-BLIP!" comes the sound of the incoming texts, though I somehow believe it was probably a Brittany Spears tone, after all, we know only She could someone to get a gun and kill somebody.

                                  The 71 year goes to the cinema's manager and complains. He then exits the extablishment, reenters and shoots and kills the texter. He claims he was in fear of his life. Apparently, the texter threw popcorn at him.

                                   He shouldn't have.

                                 Wow, really? Christ, how many people of my generation were bombarded, yes, i said bombarded by lethal barrages of popcorn , ice-filled soft drink container, empty Raisonettes/SnowCap boxes during our youth on saturday matinees where flying objects were as common as zits on a teenager? Hmmmm, maybe one of us should've pulled a Smith and Wesson and adjusted peoples thinking right quick back in the late 1960's early 1970's.

                                  WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING HERE???

                                  Christ, I use to think writing fiction was fun...

                                  Writing about reality is far more entertaining and far more frightening.

                                  I am worried though.

                                  Worried for all of us here in the Jolly Old United States. A once great land where now people's nerves are triggered as fast as their fingers on a gun.

                                  Allow me to increase your level of paranoia, if  you please.

                                   Imagine having a sneezing fit in a crowded store. You cover your face as you blast snot into your hands and some friggin' idiot takes it as an assault against them. In their demented mind they believe you're trying to infect them with H1N1, pull their trusty Colt from their hip and send your snot blowing ass into oblivion.

                                   You're buying coffee in a convenience store, Arabic music lazily playing in the background and some dickhead  screams: "THIS IS AMERICA! PLAY THE BEATLES FOR CHRIST SAKE!" as he/she whips forth a shotgun and baptizes the place with pellets. (yeah, I know Beatles weren't American, but you'd be surprised how many here don't know this.)

                                   You sitting in church on a Sunday morn. Your 2 year old daughter in bright dress and pigtails, somewhat antsy, begins to cry. You try to calm her, gently stroking her soft face  and an over zealous usher loses it and smashes your babes head with a collection plate, shrieking: WE CANNOT HEAR THE SERMON!"

                                  I sincerely wish I were wrong with the above scenarios, but we shall see.
                                  As the philosopher Jim Morrison once said: This is the End...

Mark William Darus 01152014

                                 

                                 

Another Year Ended as Another Life Takes Further Form.

                                                            Kick Drop: The Way The Big Wheel Spins.
                                                                                          by
                                                                            Mark William Darus


                       I have so little idea how some things, life occurrences, happen as they do.
                     
                       I haven't a clue how the big wheel spins, churning fiercely, stirring things up within me to create and place myself into uncharted waters. Finding berth in lands anew and vastly different than I've known before.

                       If I have learned one thing in the last two years it has been to ALWAYS follow my hunches, to trust my inner voice which I believe comes my higher power, and never doubt anything heading my way. Find beauty in the run of the mill and ugliness in things seldom looked at by the average passerby walking thru life that never give themseselves enough to meet the eyes of those they purchase Starbucks coffee or cigarettes from much the time to view the moon, sniff the rose or think about their here-and-now.

                       With photography I usually find both, where as my writing almost always ventures down the avenues of psychological nightmares to utter despair of those experiencing it.

                        I never asked for the creativity I have or the roads my passions would lead me down. I did not ask for the gifts that have been granted me in this life while travelling the brick, dirt and asphalt byways, to find the wondrous encountered or the impacts and impressions they would leave on me.

                 The stories those would share with me as I shared mine with them as plainly and simply as ordering a McDouble from a McDonalds drive-thru to those that screamed and yelled their truths to me while smashing random objects and crying hysterically in the Skype and telephone background. From Hail-Mary Email passes I was sent to face to face visits in motels, dimly lit back alleys, vibrantly lit Steak and Shakes: They'd give me what they had to share, never asking for anything but an even shake in my thoughts and words. For me to throw their lives encounters out there to be seen, read, perhaps judged by others as cautionary tales and learning tools.

                     Funny how I got this both from the predators and prey alike.

                     I have done my best to give both equal playing ground on Psychopathy Another Life.

                     In the closing of this last year what have I learned?

                     I went from a 187 LBS to a low of 148 leveling off at 153 LBS. Going from a 34 inch waist to 29 (s0mething I haven't known in over two and half decades.) and seeing the value of this and joining a 24 hour Gym to work out and on the muscles I am getting paid to develop. NICE!!!

                    We can live without much normal sustaining factors with the help of friends and those caring as they give us privilege. Internet access via codes from their wifi's, power to recharge my camera batts, to simply them being there for me via voicemails and gifts of Safe Harbours for either a place to crash as temps go into the negatives or merely have a shower or serene  bath in peace.

                    To those that offered, I cannot say enough about them. Some were family and friends while others were drug addicts and whores, thieves and clergypersons (not sure if the clergypersons thing is really a word. Aw Fuck it, call it a Bushism).  Me having a steady job and most of these having not, yet wishing me to stay with them during the sub zero temps of 48 hours last week. I'd tell all not to worry as I said thanks for the offer, but I'd  be okay. Receiving many a hug from them last week as if they'd never see me living again, we'd part company.  I made a point to see each and every one of them as the temps rose. Some said, praise Jesus, while others stated Allah is merciful, Buddha smiles, to "you are one lucky mother fucker!"

                   I told them all I'd be okay. And I was.

                  Yet, how did I know this in a home without electricity and gas? Camping in a plaster over slats wall environment where occasionally the outside temperatures would  be warmer than that of its rooms and hallways?

                   Was it sheer pride that propelled me? Perhaps.

                    Was it vanity? Yeah, right. Anyone that knows me or my words know I care little for how others view me. I look like shit most of the time and always display myself with lopsided beard, generally shabby clothing and fucked up, disgusting shoes. I think that's an accurate assessment of the physical me.

                   I learned heroin usage is not for me. I did it twice in 2013. My findings: The best of physical/psychological highs in full throttle body orgasm don't mean squat to me when waking surrounded in my own urine and fecal matter in its wake. Sorry to the addicts of this drug hooked/fooled like the millions that go to polls thinking their vote means a thing in the overall scheme of things. Perhaps a political party should be created for heroin addicts. Why not have a party for those hooked on Crystal Meth, Weed, Frisbee,  Religion, Atheism, Agnosticism, Fords, GM's, KIa Souls-(God help ya if ya forgot where you parked your Soul. yeah, boooo. lol).

                  Yet why, in the  land of endless possibilities, that being the United States of America, do we really only have two real parties to politically choose from?  Hey, we can walk into any Walmart, Kmart, Macy's, CVS, WAlgreens , Sears Rite Aide, Mcdonalds, Burger King, Denny's, Red Lobster, Olive Garden, Carraba's  and be given hosts of options for similar products, yet not arenas to make change for our betterment?  Stroll into any local bar nowadays and you're given such a massive beer list of domestic micro-brewery choices rivaling vineyards across our great lands that either from sheer depth, consumption, or both when sobering might make one wonder why.\

                   C'mon America! Are all of us only worth two real political powers to choose from? Seriously, aren't we worth so much more? For your higher powers sake, aren't we given so many more choices for things of lesser  value, like the number of cable stations we have, radio stations of choice and so many other diversions to make us go astray from the importance of how we are all getting fucked equally  by both the democratic and republican parties?

                              Perhaps, like so many Lemmings, we need to see more of us walk off the cliff and fall into oblivion for it to hit home. If you believe this, you carry far more faith than I carry as an American citizen.  Yeah, like the children of our country aren't  daily dying overseas in the middle east for little more than to protect  sheer sake of profit sharing by few, and consumption of oil b y most of us.

                              As I have said before: As an American, I am guilty of senseless violence and the slaying of innocents across this world. I AM GUILTY AS MY TAX DOLLARS PAID FOR THESE EVENTS TO OCCUR AS I PAID FOR THE CREATION OF THE BULLETS, BOMBERS AND THEIR BOOMERS, MISSILES, NERVE GAS, FUEL-AIR BOMBS. By all means from a global standpoint  hold me accountable and sentence me to death. Shit, my tax dollars should earn me this place as a singular death of me and my loss to tax-deaths might equal about 417 civilians in other lands.

                          I found personal  responsibility most lost as those gained in connectivity via tablets, cell phones and internet hustlers creating a greater world as more Non-Violent Psychopaths become born and fostered by our American Value System.

                          Politicians from both our massive TWO sides agree: There is an abuse of the welfare system as well as the unemployment system, so cut-backs become law.

                          Isn't it funny as the lack of employed here in the United States Of America hasn't brought about parallel increases in home  break-ins, personal assaults and car thefts?

                         Crack the shell that covers your brain and think for once for yourself.


                          With me about drugs. Pain Relief  caries with viable reason for physical need in managing pain. The mind  can do far better than any drug when treating others if administered properly by those that have a sound EMOTIONAL base, geared toward empathy and self sacrifice.

                              Is Self Sacrifice so hard in the realms of your supposed passion?  Satisfying tiny pangs of guilt, you toss coins, paper into Salvation Army kettles strolling in and out of stores mindlessly.

                         

                            In the heavy overtime season, my partner and I on night shift packing, on average, container by hand, about 37 tons a piece per week.. I am considering this amazing about myself, yet my partner is over ten years my age and strives to keep up. (Know this: Twenty and
Thirty year olds have failed to do barely 3/4's of what he and I can do. )      

                                get higher and higher,


                                 Sunlight causing pain to cross my, our meager bones.

                                Splashes of passionate  forsaken dreams in those of quilted sheets

MARK WILLIAM DARUS

                                     

                   

                                                   

                       


                     

                   

                     

Sub Zero temperatures crossing us. Warning shot fired across our personal bows.

                               

                                           Do you have enough water? Heat source? Job stability to survive.
                                                                   by
                                                   Mark William Darus.


                                 Being a child of Cleveland Ohio USA, born in 1962, we learned to deal with cold spells that lasted two to three months at a clip. We were taught to bear this burden to merely walk to school and get wherever. We merely wore more clothing and walked like robots as the layers of wool, cotton and polyester stifled our forward process to reach our schools, churches and jobs. We did this because we had to do so.

                           We here, in the 1970's would ha ve temps stay in single digits for days/weeks on end and simply  take it as a matter of course. We'd bundle up, our parents would send us outside to either walk to school, shovel something, whatever.

                            We learned.

                        As a result, we children grew, we'd meet up and go sledding with steel runnered Western Fliers and build ramps to fly over on Clark Field Hill. We had fun with the cold, Granted, many would say we were merely making the best of the worst scenario, yet I'd argue that whole heartedly. Fun is fun, smiles shared are smiles in lifelong memory that carry with an amazing abiltiy to create warmth in the chilliest of hearts as we get older and jaded. Confused.

                      This child growing fondly remembers the commercials from Standard Oil, later to be taken by BP British Petroleum about the perils of Fuel-Line freeze up. This happens when there is enough water in your cars gas tank for the fuel line to freeze and kill your car in its track.


                       Look at it medically this way: Your human system develop a single clot. This tiny little microscopic fucker can shut down your kidneys, trash your liver, waste your heart and lungs and gnenrally kill you. All this killer is merely nothing more than an impedance of flow of vital blood and oxygen to your organs.

                      Serious cold will do this to your Behemoth Chevy Suburban, Ford Excursion, Lincoln Navitagor regardless of your status just the same as those that own a Kia Soul, aging Dodge Neon, Saturns, SAABs, Beamers as we descend into temps colder than known in recent memory.


                       Not so many years I was given an opportunity to teach frostbite to two willing skiers, Nathan and Becki as we skied a Dawn Patrol in sub zero temperatures. heaTeaching them the tells,  discolorations and symptoms to cell death, hypothermia, gang green. we'd do two runs down the desolate slopes and head toward ten to fifteen minutes in the lodge to recharge and d back out. After about an hour of my approach, I let them, in their teens, make the decision of when we should get shelter. They'd look at one an other and make the call.

                         In a territory of less than zero, when  you inhale, your nostrils freeze and lock down as icicles develop. Mixing with the warm damp exhale, icicles further grow.

                    Some, perhaps many, would label this child abuse. Yeah, bring it on, AssClowns.

                    I have very little faith in peoples common sense to know what to do in severe cold weather.

                                My thoughts to you:

                                     Stock water. This main stay is the essence of life. Pipes will burst as watermains break about y0u lands. Civi War moment: The Value of a chamber pot can be freeing. For those of you that don.\t know what a chamber pot is. Imagine yourself, having no where else to dump your waste than into a wide mouthed pot to later shed ourdoors.

                          Hey, when you gotta go, ya gotta go. Toilets hold, as long as the water is flowing....


                                Your car in the Sub Zero's.

                                 Best defense, and unlike the Cleveland browns is a good offense. When the temps go below zero, and your car is parked in an open driveway, city street, workplace setting,  go to your vehicle every two to three hours and fire it up for about ten to twenty minutes to rejuvenate the battery. Yes, I bloody well know this will cause an inconvenience in your life,  but it might just keep your ferry safe enough to to take you where you need to go.  If you are like so many replaceable lives in the United States Economy right now, you know what I mean. Y0u call off, you DO NOT PASS GO and are fucked  into dismal worlds of faltering, though growing ranks of those unemployed across this  our nation become mere statistics.  Powers that be dismissing them as those unwilling to work eventhough their jobs have been stripped  from them as plainly as one would swipe at a fly at a sunny outdoor luncheon.

                    Yes. In all honesty. Many of  these lost-world emp-loyees were given another chance to keep their jobs. All they had to do was denounce their citizenship, leave their friends and move abroad at their expense.



                Well, welcome to the new year.
\

                 Keep blankets anf quilts in your vehicle....

                 Two human bodies is better than one in a sleeping bag.

                  Dennys restaraunts. They never close.


                   keep each other alive            
                               by
                     Mark William Darus

                           

                       

             


                       

               

               
                                         

                                                     

To the POMC (poor oppressed middle child() This is for you dearest one...

                                                   
                                                           So many memories from decades ago....
                                                           Wondrous to see the beginnings of the butterfly you have always been.
                                                   by Mark William Darus

                                     Setting the mind clock back over thirty/forty years ago, allowing the ebb and flow to attempt  its way about me as I crush normal emotion  to the faceplanted pavement. I think of the days we'd spend you and I.

                   Bitterly  Cold days post Christmas,  walking slushy pavement under cloggy footfalls we paced. My  small hand  being guided  by yours  most sercured down the labyrinth of the center of Clevelands  shopping Mecca's.  Strolling past the many homeless, asking f0r change as the smells of rich Fanny Farmers chocolates mixed with Petersons Nuts filled our nostrils as we engulfed the very best Cleveland had t0 give us. The animated windows of the May copany and Higbees displayed in our journey the best of possible lunch encounters.

                        Walking past SS Kresge, my hand in yours, you took me to WoolWorths and the best danged lunches a small could have without a parent in the  1970's.

                          i'd look into your guiding eyes that beamed such loving glows of amazing things you wanted to share with me, perhaps your wishing me to someday give to others as y0u gave so lovingly to me.

                            POMC, never doubt that gift god planted on you.

                         You'd treat me to lunch at Woolworths; on the to this fucking day looking back were the best burgers I ever ate in my life. You'd then walk to areas for me to spend my xmas money on windback tin cars  and French choclates.

                          I so remember these times, POMC. You'd often make sure my scarf covered my young flesh during those, at that time, normal single digit days. Protecting me from frostbite in such gentle fashion as we strolled he well dressed men in sharp wool overcoats and heavy golashes protecting their shoes next to their ladies in furs covering  beautiful dresses that sometimes a high wind would show me shapely legs and pressed stomachs.

                             POMC. You gave to my eldest and attempted to my youngest a Safe Harbor for in their lives as you did for me.
                          Time will tell as they grlow older and become engulfed in their lives.


                               Looki ng at monuments you'd point out as I would look to as that of a tiny frightened boy with grandparents dying and our fathers health doing its bullshit.

                              Y0u, POMC got me thru a huge stage of my life.

                             And where are we now, Dearest Companion of time?

                                   A mere phone call and a gastank away though considerably less in spirit.


                                 I give to you words you wish/need to hear from me though they can not touch a heart like mine.  This does not mean less as I look at you. You are cloxe to me few others are.

                                 Those that truly know me and are not afraid to continue to do so regardless of the curveballs I toss about are rare indeed. I am thankful you are not one of those that dismiss me.

                                  Your transformation is amazing! Dear sister, you are doing great and I believe you will continue to do so. All my strength be yours. 87 pounds lost is a reason for celebration. Yet, Americans like round numbers, so when you hit one hundred down,  PARTY ON!!!

                                    I have lost many on this journey that started almost two years ago. I have found many though, and that keeps me fueled eternally.

                                  I was profoundly grateful to see you.
                                   

                                   Perhaps on my blogs 2 year anniversary I could cook for you. The greatest influence of this now a days won't even  return  an xmas wish to her...


                             THANK YOU POMC!!!! T'was great seei ng you again.

                       by

              mark William darus
                         ps: Let this bring a smile to you. You intro'd me to these guys...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5gggPpVtEKQ&list=PL6670112DF9200B83

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

                                                 My meager gift to you,  dear readers.
                                                            by Mark William Darus

     
                                          Where should I begin to thank all the gifts given me in the last twelve months? Granted, it hasn't been  the greatest of years. I do thank my personal god for the gift of muscle memory where it involves my ability to type. Going from an ergonomic keyboard to a Laptop was most tough. Yeah, playing Grand Theft Auto San Andreas made me ragged on my HP 2000 lappy.

              Processing this video to you here has proven  a near fucking nightmare here.

               I took these shots at the Cleveland Botanical Gardens event called GLOW. Mostly gingerbread houses and a few other things. Please forgive the audio as I did not have my Sennhisers when I mastered it even though this lappy has Altec speakers, it shows me no bass volume, which I did via meters and such.

               Enough already!

             We're heading for a new year, a e we not?

              Are we, at least most of us, not having greater thoughts and carrying bigger desires for this coming year than what we realized these past 31,536,000 seconds of our lives?

              I know I am and sincerely hope you share the same as you walk, stumble, careen thru your life in your hopes, beliefs a desires for what is true and righteous.

              Learn from weaknesses as you crawl toward your dreams.

                Miracles cam happen.

               Me still being alive is but one of their many touchings on our blue marble.

               Thanks to all of you for the past twelve months. You keep me alive in ways I never knew possible.

          Mark William Darus 12262013

Sorry for phoning it in these last few months.

                                         

                                                           Phoning it in....
                                                   by Mark William Darus

                         Sorry that certain circumstances got out of my control when it has come to this blog.

                          I cannot say it has risen from a result of creativity or my ability to notice things.

                        I can say it has come from my lack of paying attention to many aspects of my life I simply found to be mundane and lacking of interest. This being the paying of bills and such.

                       I write this via a laptop while using my great neighbors internet connection as I currently have no electricity in my home. Many thanks to Dave T for this. He didn't have to do this, but am profoundly grateful he did. Thru  a vast lack of maintenance in my backyard this past summer, via the smell of dog shit, I caused him much grief. I am sorry for this as there truly is no excuse worthy.

                      Here's  what has caught me the last few months. I give you these thoughts in the broadest of strokes:

 

                       The affordable care act: ObamaCare and it's 2700 pages of complete bullshit. Millions of Americans that had good coverage have been sent UP-Yours letters from their current insurance carriers because as their coverage stands, it does not conform to this new Federal Mandate. Obama was warned about this back in 2010, so who knows where the disconnect occurred.

                     Yeah, like any health insurance that covers birth control or abortions would ever be sanctioned by the Catholic Church, Christian based companies like Hobby Lobby or Chik-fil-a would even remotely entertain that prospect.

                      In, short.As if American Health care wasn't fucked up to begin, it has only gotten worse.

                      What else is there meaningful to write about? Think about?

                      How about the guy that blew up the front of a post office and turned himself into the police before it was even reported? Surely,  and I will post a link to this is good.

                      NELSON Mandela's passing hit hard. I will write about this when I can as this caught me harder than the passing of Actor Paul Walker.  Nelsons going onward left me speechless. This Man did so much in raising South Africa, if not our Blue Marbles awareness to the simplest of human rights. It was through him I stopped buying BP gasoline (brittish petroleoum) in the USA due to their stance on appartied. sp?

                     I heard this last week about China mining the moon via drones. I thought this provoking in reference to Helium 3 and/or Hydrogen 3. I took this in as I remember NASA was going to send men back to moon. NASA planned it, spent billions of American bucks on it then suddenly pulled then plug on just a few years ago. If we got men to the moon over 30 years ago, why would it be so hard to do it now with our amazing advanced computer skills, CNC machining capabilities and simple advances in the various sciences needed to do this?
                      I received this info from old school shit my mother taught me to embrace: AM  radio talk shows. From there, I did some reading. I ask you to do the same.

                        I ask you to have patience with me. Learning a laptop with WinBlows 8 is a bit tough.

                       Keep yourselves alive. Read and question everything your government feeds you with. Remember always: The freer you are given, the more you must question.

                        Thanks,

                          Mark

                    
                  







                         

                   




                        

A Cold Day in Hell...

 

                                             

                                  American President apologizes?
                                          Never thought I'd see a cold day In Hell...
                                      by Mark William Darus

Affordable Care Act goes into full swing this January in the once great United States of America. It was constructed to make health care affordable and available to all. To many, it sounded too good to be true.

It was.

The President repeatedly told the American people they could keep their current doctors and health plans, maintaining their personal needs. He told his people this with massive confidence and unflinching stance.

Apparently, he didn't read his own fine-print.

Healthcare dot GOV was launched with all the confidence of the early Mercury Space program back in the baby-days of the US space race with Russia. Like that first unmanned rocket on the launch pad, attitudes and spirits ran high with incredible enthusiasm and hubris.

Like that first rocket launching, the skies above held clear and the most vibrant of deep blue tone, the morning air was crisp and clean. The eyes of well intentioned people held smiles as the LAUNCH BUTTON was pressed.

Applaud rang out unbridled as things went into motion.

Obama-care quickly burned to a crisp like poorly attended french fries at a fast food restaurant.

The Healthcare dot Gov website took a huge crap on virtually every nervous face that visited it. Massive lag, serious screen lock-ups, and generally poor system issues ran like an unknown virus that could eclipse the CDC. Your higher only has a clue how many entered vital, highly personal information only to be given the sweetest of messages stating the system is currently having issues, please try again later!

Nice!

When things began to fall like single snowflakes quickly turning to blizzard conditions when driving on a freeway, perceptions changed drastically.

Within the first month, several hundred thousand Americans were sent Non-renewal notices of their existing health coverage based on either the ACA mandate as Insurance companies, either on the angle of greed or simply wishing to be compliant lashed out against those people and companies that paid them tirelessly

The website was created by a Canadian company, so we were told. My god, is this to say an American company couldn't be trusted with such a monumental task in creating a highly profound piece of history?

I'd like to believe US companies desired no part in this fantastic voyage as their think-tanks advised them of the potential legal nightmares as information would be breached, identities stolen and mayhem could occur in the digital age. I believe they tanked their quotes not wanting to potentitial fall out of system breaches, bug issues and general failures to pay them a visit like a bad check risking their futures. I further believe they did this much like the Republican party during the first election of Obama. Remember, the nominated Sarah as a vice presidential candidate, a rep from a state with the second lowest number for the college electoral votes (CEV). Let's face it: Presidents are not made by a vote of the people. They are made by the power of the CEV.

Well, to make this intro short: In no time at all, as our Leader said he was sorry, members of his own party scurried for cover as the truths began to rise like putrid froth in a toxic human waste dump. Once proud supporters quickly scurried far from his side and went public as to not be covered by the growing number of flies descending on the ObamaCare river of filth. 

       One of his own advisers warned him that some 93 million Americans would lose their health coverage based on the ACA, as it was being drafted, back in 2010, our leader pressed on.

In the coming days, weeks, I hope to share with you the letters from insurance carriers declining coverage as of the New Year.

Mark William Darus 11182013

I'd like to thank the following for their kind thoughts and hopes these last two months.
Yvette L (Belgium)

Theda (South Africa)

Marya C (Mexico)

Been a while...

                                    
                     I hope everyone is doing well.
                     I have been working on a few things that, by sheer research alone has taken me away from writing the last month. I am sorry for this.
                     It is my hope that when I have more time to put down my thoughts, I will be able to give them justice.
                     Thank you for your continued reading.
                     -Mark

ObamaCare 2013:(heavy read.)

                                                       ObamaCare: sombody pull the plug with both hands!
                                                                        Mark William Darus

               
                   I will be offline for a while as I try to digest this healthcare bill. It's a monster.

                                Will write about it as soon as I can.
                                Thanks for your patience!
                           -Mark

PSYCHOPATHY: ANOTHER LIFE. A Personal Awakening.: Should we attack Syria?

PSYCHOPATHY: ANOTHER LIFE. A Personal Awakening.: Should we attack Syria?:                      I am not in favor of attacking Syria at all! What bothers me is that over 50% of the American people are against...

Should we attack Syria?

                     I am not in favor of attacking Syria at all! What bothers me is that over 50% of the American people are against it and I don't see Congress people listening to their constituents. In fact, I saw on the news one of McCain's constituents making a point and him smirking in her face. I think you make some very valid points. There is no American made pride in much of anything anymore. Sure, cars like Toyota are mostly made here, but where do the majority of the profits go? We have become a fat, lazy, complacent country and the majority of Americans are not being heard. Who will finance this attack? The American public that is over taxed already. Big business does stand to make a profit at the expense of the rest of the people.
I think if we attack, there may be an uprising here. 
-A friend, USA
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
      

                   Attacking Syria would make about as much sense as fucking for the sake of virginity. Sorry to say, your country thinks that way. And your people pay these men to think this way, no?
-Johan, Austria.


                  Why doesn't your country just simply end itself by setting its own missiles on its own lands and push the button you hold so proudly over the rest of the world and end its own misery.

                  Sorry how this would affect the Canadians and those in South America. Why is South America called so? Aren't they nations of their own people?
-Tiny Mary, Brazil

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


                   My country and lands have had many revolutions long before your speck was even created. So what, you killed each other once over a difference of opinion.

                      So proudly you state: "Over 600 Thousands Americans were killed during this war."

                   This is what happens in a revolution.

                   The American Civil war was your first and I hope it will not be your last.


                    Yeah, the Hatfield's and McClain's created such death tolls over generations as Your media gave us such entertainment in other countries. Yeah, trying to one-up centuries of rivalries, Hollywood Stylie and think the world duped? Sorry, your History Channel just made an ass of themselves globally like all the damned Storage/Pawn givings they feed your weakening minded people.

                   Why is America so fascinated with Duck Dynasty and other fudged up programming like American Idol?

Forget pacification drugs in your water and air. You live day in and day out for the lives of others.

I find this disgusting as you disregard your own lives as you watch stupidity.

Doesn't that make you kind of small when you close your eyes at night thinking of those other lives?

You not, at least most of your country, have become stupid and subservient.  You've elevated written bird cage bottoms above your peoples very own lives in importance, sacrifice it and wonder why things happened as they did.

Marc, Thanks.

Look forward to your thoughts after what is left of the internet can share and Skype will provide us.

Your country is so furious! Your politiciations so quick to judge other lands as they push their own children into poverty making the them little more than  the shitty-cloned drones of their parents that had the backbone to at least try to fight as sit back and do nothing and wonder why your country is failing.

your countries  beliefs as they rule all everything.

-Jacoline. South Africa
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------


            Mister
                          Sir
                 Mark,
                Marc?
            Why don't we just launch the missiles and kill everyone?
             Would this not cut all fears the media tosses in our favor showing we are the strongest and the best place to be?

             "C'mon DAVE, you wish me to trash the united states?"

              "Yes, Hal." Some psychopathic Chairman of the (FT LLC Corp) says jovially, recommending to our lands leader invasion is the best way to go. It being for the protection of the Nations best interests.

              Mark, I really don't care who dies or why they died. I said I would achieve a project I proposed to Sam Grant. He sort-of tossed it up the ladder. I had my forces do what must be done to end it.

             I knew damned well I would cause thousands to starve to death as my army took every bit edible stores they had to keep my boys going on as burned, crushed or crippled everything we could


             Yes, Mark. Back when, I was looked at as insane and my bestfriend was looked at as a drunk. I said at the birth of our war of civil nations it would go for years.

              They called me insane.


               They demoted me, sir. Asked me to give them my Sabre. At that point I resigned to so-called Union  Army thought it held with glued fragments


                    I was a disgrace to my beliefs, my country and worse, my wife and children.  I did everything I could in civilian life and failed.

                   But when shit hit shoulder, I was asked to come back to the Northern Army.

                     Bispecktled  midgets giving me orders.

                    


                Yet they held Sam in the rafters. Looking at him as drunk and wayward leader at best.

                He'd lead his men into a battle.

                A hip flask raised to his lips as he shouted.

                  "ATTACK!"

                  Following his fearless lead, the Men of the Union effort would follow his leadership time and time again, even after defeat.

                  US Grant never retreated, or to say he would acknowledge a defeat by stepping backward

                 I am thankful I was 'the Drunks' best friend.


                Like you don't know this slender tree-lengthen


              Humans have a nature to wish, desire and want to  either kill  or control kill each other. In this they create a reason and a purpose. From this they elevate men to levels creating political hierarchy


             Fuck the colored warning graduated symbols we're given for a threat level by our SO CARING  and  should be looked at as OUR NATIONS MOTHER.

               If our countries defense systems cannot be accurate, Well, whose can be?

              Our Media gives us Threat Levels here in television broadcasts, specialty programming giving ways to not die if we're attacked: Safe-Rooms with space enough, proclaimed by their advertisement, : "the world can crumble around you and you could still have a great (wine) in the company of a special partner."

               I know you got this, Mark.

               But think of what I just wrote. Can any of just scroll up for a second.





               Did the creation of Homeland Security stop the gangs, innocent drive-by deaths as drug deals go bad or gang spaces go sideways across America?

               
                 Fuck Election in americahh! I have voted every single instance.

                 I was born 14.2.1951

                Voting means SHIT on a national level here!

               





First off: Thanks for your words. Can I post this on my blog, under a pseudonym of course? I was in Zoar this weekend for a civil war reenactment. Over a few beers and harder things, I asked a group of people what would happen if the USA goes to war with Syria, and the Chinese backing them were forbidden to bring their endless flow of product to our shores via a military blockade?  Most said: "AWE, big deal, fuck 'em!" Then I said we  didn't have to worry about that, really. Many said: "See, told ya so." I then said the latest I had read about China's stance, where they said: "if America invades Syria, we will no longer ship to them and cease all ties!"

I found it amusing how their faces changed like  the colours of falling leaves on a brisk autumn day. Bright, shadowed, muted shades, descending to the ground.

A few said: "yeah, so?"

I took a massive swig of Pepsi and said: "Do you think Levi's are made here anymore? Converse shoes, Hagar, Wrangler, Route 66, Fading Glory (fitting name truly for a jean company that was bought out by the Chinese some 15 years ago and featured at Walmart? Ever look at the spices you have in your home? Garlic salt/powder fine print stating: Product of America and processed in China. We make little to nothing here except debt for the benefit of cheaper/faster consumption.

I wasn't popular after that. I'm such a buzz-kill sometimes.

Heidi, I, as well as my International friends both  with my blog and facebook think an uprising is what we need here. Not a civil war against a part of a nation so much as one against the powers that be. I'm, sorry to say, happy you see this as a possible future for our country.

What was it Thomas Jefferson wrote about a government in question by the people?

""We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.
That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security."

Maybe he was gifted in more ways than his complete and sincere  ability to write, Heidi.

Heidi: There will, eventually be blood shed. There always  is with us and America. Our taxes pay for the bullets and bombs, and we never vote on wars, do we as a people? Sure, we protest, flood the PaperPlace known as Washington DC, and have stands all across our fifty states and it NEVER makes a difference at all in decisions made.

We've been in the Middle East how long now? How many dead on every side. Soldiers, civilians, children and innocent babies a few hours old?

The Bush family had close ties with the Bin Laden family via the Carlyle Group. Biggest aspect of the Carlyle Group were American Military Industry. How cool is to create an attack, forcing US action against those you view as little more than cattle in your country for the benefit of stock riches? Both families and their friends  gained bucks bigtime when the bodies hit the floor and the roofs went aflame when our country took action over 12 years ago.

And didn't we get the Bin Laden Klan safe passage out of the USA during a No-Fly for non military aircraft period just after 911? And we as citizens paid this for their safety with our tax dollars?

Bell Helicopter survived as the result of the Vietnam War. They were on the verge of bankruptcy.

Halliburton and Lockheed went godlike after 911.

Hal still does.

Where should we place our dollars in form of Stock Shares to benefit EVERY FUCKING DWINDLING AMERICAN CLASS WORKER TO BENEFIT, ALBEIET IN LOWBALL AMOUNTS LIKE CORPORATE AMERICA DOES?

                Sorry, kids.

                You have a brain. use It .

                

              I am nothing most of you would know.

                    I am