A Child Dead Lost Like Tears in the Rain. Baptism Given by Jesus...

                                         

                                          A Child  Lost Like Tears in the Rain,
                                                                         by
                                                       Mark William Darus.

             
                        Decomposing Toddler Found in Apartment.
                       
                        I am so disgusted and angry by this I don't know how to begin writing about it.

                        I heard about this while driving to work listening WTAM on the radio. I was swigging my Dark Roast coffee from Speedway, puffing an L&M Turkish Blend 100, happy this was my last day of work this week. I have Friday off as I need to go downtown to get a copy of divorce decree to get a marriage license as well as have my Trailblazers front end get a serious mechanical overhaul.

                       A commercial about Home Windows,  with an enthusiastic female singer, trailed off...

                       "A toddler was found dead in a crib in Medina today! It is believed this child had been dead for some time due to the state of decomposition..."

                               I screamed aloud, put my right fist into roof of my SUV, "NOOOOOOO!!!!" This at the intersection of Bagley and Pearl rd, on a sunny afternoon, my eyes seeing kids running into the McDonalds for Happy Meals with parents in tow.

                             I heard another crying, sobbing louder than I had ever heard before. I looked to the direction.

                             I saw a blond haired lady with dark aviator sunglasses. She looked so disturbed and messed up. She was trying to wipe away her tears without taking her shades off.  I'm quite certain many would video this for a You Tube entry, but not me.

                           "You Okay? " such a stupid question to toss to another while watching them hurting. I so sometimes believe myself idiotic and dense.

                           "I-Iiiiiiiiiiiiiii, rayyyyyyyyy-D-OH st-st-st-st0ry of dddddead kid."  she struggled while trying quench tears with a handkerchief, her delicate hands clearly trembling about her face.

                             Red light went to Green.... no one honked. Odd....

                           "I heard as well just now. I am hurt by news like this. Do you believe in Jesus?"
                     
                           "YYYYYESSSSS" shades off, her eyes meeting mine.

                            "Let's pray as we go about our day for this child, okay?"

                              She went her way as i went mine.

                               I think of the past. Songs about people cut down, slaughtered and anthems created to have a nation rise.
                                   4 Dead in Ohio


                    Yet so many children are slaughtered each and every year in my nation while no songs are made for them. No monuments raised in their honor as they never had a chance to live after being born.  Their tiny bodies in various states of decomposition, perhaps being gnawed on by animals, after being discharged by yet another pedophile.

                                   Let me make one point most clear here.

                    No, I am not talking about Abortion!  I have my beliefs on this and am willing to share that with anyone strong enough to listen to me.

                     I'm talking about babies born into seriously horrific places.

                     Movie Quote: The Breakfast Club: Judd Nelson, his character abused with cigarette burns via his father, says,  (and I will mess up this quote,  but here goes: "You have to pass a test to get a drivers license, but they'll let any swinging dick become a father..."


                     These so innocent  Babes created into peace and beauty,  later to be   tossed into so many filthy and foreboding elements after being discharged from clean and friendly environments of a hospital. From smiling  Nurses/Aides , loving their job, greeting,  cooing over their so fragile, tiny frames from  feeding them to administering Light to thwart of jaundice.  These Nurse/Angels giving them an incredible best start from sincere heart and dedicated belief of professionalism,

                      These  Incredible men and women, Nurses/Aides and House Keeping personnel with their smiles/prauers and best wishes  welcome a new child into OUR world to eventually send them off...

                       As they let go, at times  their instincts wanting to pull child back into their safe-ness, they 'Do their Job' and release. Imagine their plight, being and pray for them as they need to the best we can offer up to support them.

                  AMERICA! FOR SAKE OF YOUR OWN CONSCIENCE, or for your belief in Jesus, find your balls, or tits as you are female and speak your mind!!!!!: So many children are slaughtered, sold in pedophile jungles both here and abroad each and every year.

                    My Brothers and Sisters in Jesus, may i ask you this? How many of these babes were ever Baptized?  My Question to runs deeper and i believe it relevant. : Can a group of believers in Jesus do a baptism for those who never stood a chance for a baptism?

                      I sincerely believe we can find a way as I know this can be in my heart.

                     In Jesus name, I pray!!!!!

                      I will find a way to make this happen for them, so help me God!!!!

       

                      -Mark william Darus
                   

                   

                 

                     

                   

                       
                     
                       

                   

                       

May i Ask You to take A Moment and Pray,

                 May i Ask You to take A Moment and Pray, Send Hope to Lafayette Louisiana.
                                                                   by
                                                                MWD.



                         After a fairly odd night at work, spending some twenty minutes decompressing with Craig, talking about work and life in general after clocking out.

                    i Work in a machine shop. Tons and Tons of metal is crafted into axels, shafts and transmission parts. Raw material fed into machines by the  amazing men and women i work with, getting spat out and put into steel bins, usually totaling anywhere between 1 to 2 tons in weight. These are moved about via Mitsubishi TowMotors about the shop. Well, the shop redid the floor and seem highly worried about scuff marks/scratches on the floor.  I believe I am heading for a write-up as marks, scars and drag-marks happen on oily surfaces at the colossal speed of 1 to 2 miles an hour. I truly feel for and love my BOSS as he brings scratches and such discovered on day shift  to my and others attention.  I cannot imagine how he feels about wanting us to be gentler, softer and further careful and vigilant when setting TONS of weight to recently painted concrete flooring. He's a proud man, did time in our Army, and I think his mind is blowing chunks on this. He may be my BOSS, yet he has one as well.

                  CRaig and i  usually talk to each other every night after work. We comment about sounds heard, occasional coyotes baying, frog sounds and hilarious PA messages from seriously over-worked men  for a towmotor operator as they imitate one another. We laugh, share things, shake hands, enter our vehicles after saying "seeya later today, or Seeya in the PM" as those that work hours like us, there is no tomorrow except for weekends.

                   i get into my Trailblazer, fire up the straight 4.2 and click my radio to life and am greeted with-

                   "Police are not releasing the name of the 58 year old white male that killed 3 people while gunning down 7 more at a movie theatre in Lafayette Louisiana during the opening of the film Trainwreck. "

                     i was stopped hard by this news. Just two days ago I reread an old blog entry about the Colorado Movie shooting that the shooter is now on trial for.

                     

                     i began crying as i thought about how those there must have seen this come down before their eyes. i thought about children that may have been there and what their minds, innocence shattering as bullet fire rang out and how scared they must have been.

                     Needing cigs, I stopped at the GetGo on my way home. i asked the register worker what she thought the shooting.

                      She hadn't heard of it, nor had the three people behind me. Quickly, The Three nailed their SmartPhones discovering it. i heard heaving gasps from them, a couple saying 'my god!"

                       "WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?" an Applebees  smock clad waitress exclaimed.

                        "I need to call my wife," a tired looking black man in overalls shared.

                     "your total is 12 dollars and 30 cents,"

                      Swiping my debit card across a reader, i offered this: "pray for them if you have it within to do so."

                      A stranger put his hands on my shoulders as i turned around to exit. He was crying, saying, "Dear Lord Jesus, be with the ones in the hospital, their friends and children."

                     i looked into this mans eyes and felt his  words/hearts desire to God.

                     my Savior, Jesus, thank you making me do what i do and see what occurs around me.

                   

                      He is With us, Always
                          click link above for the song.

                    Father of all beautiful and wonderful things, i ask you to stretch your loving arms around the people of Lafayette Louisiana as they struggle, cry, hurt, and wake this morn feeling way different than they had to day before. Dear holder of my heart and soul, i pray you be with them as you have always stuck by my side never straddling  a fence as I faltered before you . i kind of know you will, yet i ask you all the same. I cannot fully know nor imagine how big your heart and thoughts for us  truly must be. Your love so great and vast,  eclipsing the highest Earthland peaks while delving into depths far lower in the darkest,  most secretive and protected parts of our hearts.  Lord, Jesus, if you were a music studio (and in my heart of hearts, you are to so many. Inspiring them, fueling them, touching their minds causing fire to ignite within them,  nailing hearts to share to the world.) your soundboard would have a billion plus sliders to balance.  i beseech you both, my Jesus and his Dad, God: Have this city awaken in a few hours and see your glory and peaceful embrace hold them. They will be hurting in ways i sickly can imagine. This  coming weekend, parents telling loving children that maybe going to a movie isn't a great idea right now, give these parents blessed alternatives being a picnic in the park, their kids and friends cooking the kitchen night, and.or whatever ideas you would grant them, if lost without your love, or simply blindsided today and hold you high.

                      my Loving and Guiding Force in my sinful heart, Jesus: Have others extend arms around to embrace so many so hurting across my lands this morning. God, shove some incredibly stubborn to place in their heart they can place a quivering hand to another s shoulder as they express: I'm sorry for your loss.

                  Lord, their minds must be rifling across so many things: Movies, Not Safe. Churches, ditto, forget Postal offices, Jobs, schools, gas stations, Malls, where is Safe Harbor?

                 My Heavenly Father, teach them easier than you did me in letting them know the only safe place is how we live each day while trying our hardest to try and stay by your side and not stray from you.

                So grateful you gave yourself for us.

                 In Jesus name, i pray, Amen.

     - MWD. words from me shared via permission given ALL of us to do so. What is your cost of faith? How would having faith hurt you? Just asking....

               Be Blessed in your walk.

                   

                 
                     
     
                   


             

                       

Drops in the Ocean....Sandra Bland. I know what I heard of you.

                                                                        Drops in the Ocean....
                                                                                     by
                                                                      Inspirational Avenues
                                                                                MWD.


                      The Physical Leader of, (the failing Nation of the United States of America, going through slow death-throws much like that of Rome when it fell centuries ago),   my country tosses a contract with Iran to stop them from going Nuclear. Wowie!!! How awesome is that? Stock potential markets spiked, massive investment prospecting to be gained in Iran. Yeah, Buddy! Jump aboard the Lust Boat and get you portfolios ready!!!!

                       And look at us, those in the USA, mending fences with Cuba. Their tourist trade has climbed some 15% in the last 4 months.  Granted, I thought my countries wish to Kill-the-Beard most archaic and asinine.

                Part of the agreement with Iran says we, WE (USA tax dollars at work, yours and mine) will teach them how to defend against others....

                Hmmmm, didn't we say we would do the same for the  Ukraine?  Soon after Olympics ended, did not Russia go after the Ukrianes borders? And what did we do? Sanctions prompting their head of Space Station relations to suggest that the USA build a huge trampoline to reach the international space station instead of hitching a ride with their crew.



                Wow, really? I guess the stock/greed factor in my country isn't as great in the Ukraine as it is in Iran.

                  TELL ME HOW THIS DOES NOT SUCK!

               I get it, really I do.

               It's all good as long as our Iphones work.

               A woman drives half way across the country for a job interview to which she is hired and given a start date at Her alma moter . She later gets pulled over and is arrested. She is, according to released documents, released the same day and found dead, hanging by slendor neck in a Texas jail cell.
               Her family and friends say she would not commit suicide.

               I know if were given a job in my hearts desire I would so break the law, get arrested and thus OFF myself immediately after being released. And better yet, off myself in the very same cell I was released from. Yeah, I can so see this.

              Can't  you?
             
              Screw That Noise!

             I hate to say there is vile and sick work in our OH-SO comfortable UNITED STATES of Amerika.

             Wow,  really, hold her, Sandra Blands death, horrifically untimely by my thoughts given me in you arms of positive thought and prayers.

              Well, I can so say this with you all: When I got hired after a 4 months lack of employment I knew I WANTED TO GET PULLED OVER AND GET 'SUICIDED' !!!!

             There is a filthy Hatred that fills our Earth.

             I pray for Sandra Bland and her friends and family.

              My thoughts:

            SUICIDE?!?! SORRY, NO CHANCE IN HELL!

             I sincerely believe my United States of America is poised on the brink of revolution on so many fronts we now have about 18 republican candidates to hold in sway as they Mesmerize us with spells, glances and rhetoric. Yeah, brothers and sisters: Drink their Koolaide, damn your childrens futures for further education and damn them for their next twenty years with House Note on a place they will never own.

                 
                  Take Sandra Bland into your heart, Jesus.
                   Hold her family and friends close as they dive for explanations,

                  Texas is a proud state....

                    Sandra did not End Her Life in my opinion.

                   Sandra was a victim of racism.

                  She was killed by fools.

                  Mark William Darus.








       

         



           

                 

Praise God From Who All Blessings Flow...

                                              Praise God From Who All Blessings Flow...
                                                                            by
                                                            Mark William Darus (seriously, I'm but a typist, and in all honesty, not a very good one...

                                            Play this redone Classic as you read this, if you'd be so kind.
                                           Praise God From Who All Blessings Flow....
                     

               For some reason while at work tonight i began thinking about Brooklyn Memorial United Methodist church, the church of my youth. For some  reason, i felt a sense of melancholy as mind drifted backward across many decades. My thoughts, other-directed, running in so many directions i nearly became overwhelmed by the sheer force pushing them and nearly placing my seriously battered Mitsubishi Towmotor into  caressing a wall at 1 MPH. (yeah, 1, one, Uno, ) Granted, Kissing the wall behind the bank of pre-WWII Acme-GRidley's, going further into the Hydromat machine areas, such low-speed slidings occur on a regular basis. As long you don't hit a machine or CoWorker, it's all good in the Hood.

               My mind began replaying songs I sang in  BMUMC's Youth Choir, later, the Adult Choir, eventually culminating to a Sunrise Service that our Youth Fellowship did twice before the congregation, at their request.  We created a Passion Play singing,  with piano accompaniment from a highly gifted/talented man,  using songs from both Godspell and Jesus Christ Superstar.   Wow, was that really 38 years ago? I was 14 then,.. All bright-eyed and bushy tailed, energetic, enthusiastic, optimistic...

            52 for a few more weeks. Oddly, i don't feel that old at all. i think i know why this is so.

           Bare with me, gentle reader:  kick your seat back, take a sip of wine, don't let your popcorn burn the inside of your microwave...

             I have always been of the belief that we only Downward age, become  truly OLD, tired and feeble in Mind and Soul, when nothing beautiful, unique, bizarre, captures the very sense of Awe in witnessing those. We were given, since our birth,  a divine blessing, when the gift of sight, sound, smell and feeling was Brand New to us. Didn't we then suck everything up like Moses  walking  the desert plains  finding a water source?  And did not you grow with each event you took into your mind, memory, heart and soul?

           So let me ask you this: At what point did you stop seeing beauty, hearing sincere laughter, relishing the smell of fresh baked bread with buttery top? When did you allow yourself to lose touch with the wonder of everyday enlightenment granted each and everyone of us while our eyes are open, ears always taking in even when asleep, nostrils catching air that our tongue give us taste?

         i AM GUILTY OF THIS!! Christ knows I wandered decades ago and stupidly thrusting my ass into a Soul Eclipse that had me see nothing wonderful, amazing or precious even as my daughters were growing. I so then easily drank the Guyana Grape Koolaide and sucked in the media's desire to show nothing good, precious, pretty in this life.  I ruled these streets for years, still loving Jesus, just somehow missing the connection as either trains, planes, ships or the fuckin' bus was missed by me.

           "WE'RE HERE LIVE ON THE CORNER OF EAST 55TH AND EUCLID WHERE A SHOOTING JUST OCCURRED." The pretty blond on screen speaks as camera shows her smiling before all, hair swaying gently in a breeze from right to left, sometimes landing on the  royal blue dress that flatters her figure.


       "A carbomb detonated in Belfast today, killing 28 and injuring 50 others."  a heavy accented man cries out...

                   "Watch out for Killer Bee's in your neighborhood!!! These bees, other called: Africanized bees are highly agressive and can be lethal!"

                      I'm sure you get my point,

                So easily are we to swept away in bad currents flowings and  become negative, yet we so eagerly, wantingly wish  to share these down-thoughts with others.  Perhaps hoping, desiring their DArkness to match us, meet us. Misery loves company, does it not? ((( SO DON'T YOU EVER LET ANOTHER BRING YOU DOWN!!!!  )))

                     If you have a love of life, ANY  passion beating in your chest and mind/soul, a crooked smile tossed at one slipping on icy pavement and their sustaining balance after several moments, for the walker- sheer panic nailing them and your tossing fist to heavens, undoubtedly nailing cars cieling while yelling "YEAH!" when he strolled toward car, not falling.

                Standing in a shopping line at the Giant Eagle on Pearl Rd in Middleburg hts, , I was behind a woman in a beautiful floral-patterned dress. Her long, incredibly lovely brunette locks , coursing over well toned shoulders flowing down to shapely legs. . High cheeks, strong facial features, soon lost composure as she  began firing enormously loud and extremely odoriferous sharings...

         "V----RUMPH! VVVVVVVVV-RRRRRRRRRRU-----UMPH! " Sound immediately hitting ears and smell quickly nailing nostrils of all those in the 5, maybe 10 foot circumference from bottom-zero.

         I watched her when this happened, her face not looking nearly so confident, secure. Her eyes darting from right to left as if trying to mate with mind to elsewhere make needed excuse to cover, and sorry to say this pun, cover her ass.

            What did I do?

         I was directly  behind, well, her behind,  when it fired things for an incredibly long time.  Keep this in mind: I know so many sisters and brothers with IBS (irritable bowel syndrome). I've shopped, stopped and waited patiently with them for theirv cramps to subside, fade away and such.  And why am I one of the only of Jesus's children to share this for others understanding?

           Okay, what did you do, A-hole????

            "I'm ----- sooooo ------- very-------sorry!!!" she spoke in wavering and lost tone,  her blue eyes creasing into slits, tears welling up in them. Lips ends descending downward toward FrownVille.

          So many in audience spoke.

           "dang, Bitch! You smellz az bad az a SHEEE-Kah-GOOOO stockyard in highz Auuuuu-guZZZT!" a highly creative and quickly leaving man states to his woman. She quickly states: Fucckkaaaah, I be a nursing assistant! We smells shit every mother loving day! You needs to get a job, serious. Asshole!!!!"

            An exquisitely well clad female in Michael Kors gear, sporting long, finely manicured nails on both hands and feet,  opens her gaping, disgusting  mouth-trap for all to hear: " Honey, ever hear of Depends?!?!?  You should think about it. Damn! If I throw up, I am gonna spew toward you!"

           Several witnessing laughed while others looked bewildered at this womans remarks.


           Well, i did what i do: Unleash thoughts not mine, open my mouth and  be what I like to be though others would call me an asshole.  i did the me-thing, and just spoke out...

      (to the lady saying the fart lady needs Depends: "C'mon, really? You think Depends stop the sound and smell? Are you an idiot in the highest order?" Stopped a moment, stared at her blank expression and went for the Killshot:  (yeah, I said Killshot. I somehow thought I needed to go  extreme with this woman, and somehow found the strength to do so.  I went brash, filthy and disgusting on this.

              "and may I ask you where your bodily functions might create inordinate events in your life?
Ever think about that? Guess not, so walk away, meet me in the parking to chat furthers, whatever..."

             I locked eyes on the embarrassed woman with IBS and simply smiled. I said a sharing from memory with my youngest daughter every morning as I walked her down the stairs and every other step she would fart. I laughed and thanked this woman: "my youngest farted every  other step each morn while going downstairs. Thanks for reminding me how precious that is!"

              She managed a smile, nodded her head to me, and left...





                Difficult is the path that makes you see, feel and want to share with others what you find amazing, sweet and just plain  pretty.

               
           Well, It is my sincere hope you can and do this with others. Give all those you encounter positive thoughts, inspirations, hope and the sharings of gifts given you. I don't care what god they have, doesn't matter in my book. With my JC, it matters not if nonbelievers believe in Him, HE BELIEVES IN THEM!!!!!!

          -Mark William Darus
       

Can I Play With Madness? Reprisal: June 25 2015.

                                         Can I Play With Madness?
                                                            by
                                              Mark William Darus.

                                   part one written November, 2014.  part two given me as moon dives into rising sun this morn today.

                             I started this blog with a direction of NonViolent Psychopathy in mind. In the last two and half years, it has run a gambit from that simple starting point to vast areas I never knew I'd find in my research. Yeah, mostly dark and bleak in their nature yet enlightening for those still capable of learning.

                                         Can I Play With Madness?
                     One constant being a song by a band called Iron Maiden and their musical story: Can I play with Madness. (or as one of my daughters would sing it at a very young age: Can I play with Magnets? lol Gotta love how the innocent hear things!

                 This blog started on the heels of a local school shooting, that being in Chardon Ohio, going to areas of psychopathic politicians, corporate CEO's, Members of the Clergy, Dating Relationships and so on and so forth.

                 I find myself lost these days more often than not though...

                  Why so?

                  We've gone from work place postal killing sprees, school killings, and random gang related drive-by killings to be-headings, Hatchet people going after cops to Ebola bouncing around and about.

                   My thought about Ebola: If the sick and stricken Americans  with this can be brought back to the USA and be made well through treatment, how is it that we as a nation don't treat West Africa with the same money we would give any other country descimated by an Earthquake, Tsunami or other cataclysmic event?

                 I think most of us know the answer for this. No profit to be gained helping Africa. So what do we do? We send the 101st Airborne and 4000 National Guard troops over there. I don't like what I am about to write, but will write it nonetheless: My thoughts and prayers go to yet the further Lemmings we press into areas like we did in Vietnam.  Our Male and Female soldiers, the sons and daughters our land, following orders given them.
 
                      I am lost finding a single area to write about as I am infuriated by what is going on. Help me out. What would you like me to write about? Thanks. I think this song/link works globally with the internet.
            Wishing you the best,
            -Mark William Darus

                   part two:

      06252015 Authors Note:  As I reread this, editing it along the way, I realized something: Playing with Madness, insanity and the depths of depression is as familiar and commonplace to me as one might find in tying a shoelace. It's just something you do and never question why you do it. I've studied psychology for over 40 years now and have never lost an interest in it. I started this back when, age 12,  to perhaps gain a better understanding of myself, though I think the greatest side-effect of my studies gave me a way to help others suffering with minds, thoughts, and lives that hurt them in ways highly difficult to cope with. <granted, I didn't get that part until late teens and so forth.>

            I was not without sin during this lifelong journey though. I used a lot of what I'd learned about human behavior to manipulate  girlfriends, bosses and others for whatever reason I had at the time. Yep, doesn't speak highly for me, does it?  How ugly is it to have an ability to place gentle,  loving, caring people on a chessboard and move them around it for little more than our own amusement?  Well, never wishing to mince words: THAT'S PRETTY FRIGGIN DISGUSTING, LOW AND NASTY!!!!

                   A word of  PROFOUND thanks to Jesus and his POPS: Why did you not strike me down as I did what I did to others? I used knowledge from reading books,  perception from watching others reactions in  many Emergency Rooms, and finding the damaged females, and twisted things horrifically so to get, gain, something....? I cannot justify what I have done before your eyes, yet you let me live....

           All I can speculate is this while looking back  (trying to be humble during this writing and not blasphemy and presume the mind of God) : Jesus and his Pops had something in store for me as I went about my life then. I'm not suggesting they condoned, appreciated nor applauded what I did to others. I do, however, feel they loved me and gave me massive latitude while I strayed, toyed, messed with others to learn from their reactions.

           All things began to change in me as I began to learn patience. This occurred in my thirties, a divorce being the stress factor leading to me nearly killing myself that first Christmas afterward.  I had placed a bottle of sleeping pills I had purchased at a Discount Drug Mart on a shelf that cold sunny day December 1992. My daughters, safe at their  mothers home for the weekend, out of sight, out of mind.

           They, my girls, were away from me....

           On fallen knees, having spoken my peace, begging forgiveness for my weakness from my Lord and saviour, yet unable to surrender then ,  I reached for the bottle of eternal slumber and stopped suddenly. My  eyes, mind, heart and/or perhaps what was left of my soul caught something stopping me fast.  I began  bursting into tears, bringing fists and forearms firmly to floor, wanting to feel a sense of physical hurt to match my mental loathing of myself. I had caused so much damage to others, I caused one who loved me to walk away from... . I had placed the tablets  of Self-Elimination in front of picture of my daughters, my eyes caught theirs in the photo, and with that, the worst and ugliest part of my life died forever....

          I have to thank Sue  <Winkie, back in the-day!> (I cannot find it in my heart to call her an EX. She did what she had to do, And I will always understand this. I was not good to be around then. I will always give her credit: She is the BEST, most gifted artist I have ever known and freely recommend her name to  every place but French Bistros. )  for that photo. She suggested we take a free photo thing from somewhere of the girls.  I believe that photo at divine drop of pill vessel caused me to take stock.

          "Wow, how Spooky is dat chit, m'yan?" me asking how would Tony Montana  (Scarface would say it, lolol.)  We're talking spiritual happenings like  AM talkshow  radio stations like Coast to Coast AM show (1100 WTAM),  George Noury callers   share conversations with others that have mystic aliens place their trash on their front lawns (or is it  those dang Government Snoopers) digging deeper into their brains?  Another proclaiming  "Sasquatch is relieving  Rheumatoid Arthritis pain for all those that amble down to the corner of  Pierce rd and Welsh, just catty-corner from the old Sinclair Fuel Station, and yeah, the old Di-nuh-sewer  sing is still hanging on the post. He's a tad rusty nowadays, but he's still a-hanging thar! "  To: "Hey, Jade Helm is taking, maneuvering around recently closed Walmart stores, converting them into either future interment camps or ammo dumps, bro! Ever see semi's, ya know, tractor trailers, man, with US DOT markings on their sides? Really? Dude, this ain't good for any of us...."

         Spooked out, freaking, crying like the lunatic that I was at that moment, I gave up for the first time in my adult life.

            Was embraced by Jesus.

                 Being  both human of flesh and fragile in spirit, I would still often walk away....

          Patience is a gift, is it not? Sure, soft spoken, encouraging parents tell us in our early years:  " Be patient, Maribeth, Christmas is but a few weeks away and you will find what Santa brings you. Now go back to your homework, okay?"  But look to yourself and ask this: When did you learn to be patient?

                Well, I found I could help others versus fucking with them the all I had learned. This is not to suggest I didn't backslide many a time wanting a comfort zone periodically. God knows I did.

             I think I was granted further living   to teach others things they never thought about in their lives.  Those aspects  being with family, man-woman relationships, workplace environments to political/religious and how  they could be used/abused by them and how to avoid such things.

               Looking at this blog with Newer Eyes now, knowing why I wrote what I did as I will always stand by the words i placed here. Apparently\, I am called to continual do so here...

              God's Not Dead, and oddly, Neither is this Blog. I wish I could say I am sorry, yet I cannot do so. Thru this dark, ugly place I created,  I, given words from otherness, reached others far and wide and still do. I CANNOT, WILL NOT, turn my back on you that still read here!

             Hugs and blessings to you all,
              Mark William Darus. 06252015

To Everything, Turn, Turn, Turn...

                                                   To Everything, Turn, Turn, Turn...
                                                                             by
                                                               Mark William Darus.

               Yeah, the title for this entry I stole from The Byrds.
             
                Indulge me, if so kind, and hit the link and listen as you read my words.
                                                          The Byrds. Turn...

                How does one end something they created and freely tossed to our Blue Marble?

                 A place  for all to read, learn and hopefully grow as lights might go off in their heads, thinking: 'Damn, now I get it!' and/or 'Wow, how could I have been so blind?' Perhaps: 'Is that how they got a promotion over me?' and many other thoughts some might be hit with.

          It was my intention to show all readers the highly dark and ugly places many of us have either fallen into or created in others and how these events occur in our lives. To show this simple truth: You are Not Alone. I think all of us have either been used by others, have used others for personal gain, or both over time.

               We're both Predator and Prey to one another, are we not? More often than not, both exist in each and every one of us on a daily basis at any given moment.

                    You disagree? No problem, though I ask  you consider this before sending me harsh emails: You feel like you're being used by your boyfriend/girlfriend/coworker/ a boss that steals your ideas to elevate their position, whatever. For reasons you hold within your heart of hearts sacred, maybe fearing what might happen if you talked about them to another,  most likely held from your childhood experiences of physical, sexual or emotional abuse.  You, alone, yet being anothers prey, go  out and about on your time away from those controlling. You are shopping, getting gas, having nails painted to please the "him" / getting a haircut to please the 'Her', while your mind is spinning of thoughts never ending of personal failures in you taking an hour from a week for yourself. As you spending this hour for yourself, relishing it, loving it, cherishing it,   something goes south of expectation, making your brain cross mental terminator.    You so quickly turn  from hunted to hunter at an others small misdoing ,one easily corrected, yet still you go all vocal Isis on them. Belittling them with harsh words, your eyes showing fiery pupils of daggers, the twist of your face displaying your enjoyment for doing to others, hurting others, as you have let yourself fall into a world of bad decisions.  While they apologize, attempt to correct things, struggle at minimum wage to make things right with you, Not Enough for you, is it? You always have to point out how their hair is uneven, a nose piercing sets not quite right, the tat on your arm is misspelled, you're too fat to please any man, honey, forget wearing pink and know vibrators will be your only mate....

             Yeah, I have heard all those above in check out lines across many venues.  I have seen shoppers go so rotten as to say after the cashier told them the total cost for third time was greeted with from a so caught by cell shopper snaps: "damnit, Beyatch! What does I neee- DANG! NOT YOU, sorry hon, I am just asking dis bitch runnin my card to STOP INTERUPTION ME NOW!!!"

                     I thank my  HIGH-FIVING GOD, the pappy of Jesus for giving me an avenue to wander, learn, struggle with a life without things most take for granted.  You said when I would just surrender to you, I would find what made me different.  Well, I found out at your will, sorry my sisters didn't like this.

                 Yet,  I am struggling now. I believe this mental creation given at my hands from othernous, be it God as he gives me the Black and White to write with or Jesus that has me share beauty and redemption for all  to experience safe harbour  with.

                    I would like to give thanks to those that visited Psychopathy: Another Life. My Friends and readers, 48000 strong over it's 3 year life.  I humbly thank the over 88  countries, that read my ramblings, shreddings, carings,  You took time, read my shotguns blasting of thoughts,,, How can not I  say you are the best your country has to give me. IN ALL HONESTY,  I LOVE YOU ALL, HUG YOU ALL. WHERE HAVE WE NOT GONE TO FILTHY DISGUSTING AREAS,  finding pennies on a platform to feed us..

              My Dearest God!  your accidental baptisms Hits my left arm cooling it, sweet. So many, annoyed, rain drops falll.


           again, how does one end something..... How do we slay a comfort zone for better benefit ??

                   Thanks for your sharings. support, belief in something greater tHAN YOURSELF.... Freely taking goosebumps on forearms, the tender strokes across the  back neck, ,                    WE'RE THE DREAM WARRPRW        


  Christ, Jesus, your father lead me on this path of a blog. I must end it now and I find myself crying,  hurting and sobbing surrendering further to your will for me to grant avenues to share with others.   My father, I will to try to make it worthy of you.

         Before closing this, I would like to thank the people of these many lands I have met in the physical world, though they have visited and touched my life: your reading my words kept me alive.

                   Thanks to the people of these proud lands that took the time to read me: Czech Republic, China, Korea, France, UK, Russia, Brazil, Spain, Mexico, South Africa, Malta, Ukraine, Canada, Sweden, Iceland, Germany, Belgium, Afghanistan, Serbia, Portugal, Thailand, Kenya, Norway, Syria, Greenland, Latvia, Costa Rica, Finland, Belize, Rwanda, Greece, Nepal, Australia, Italy, Hungary, Libya, Japan, Taiwan, Lebanon, Trinidad and Tobago, Slovakia, Denmark, Cambodia, Bangladesh, Fiji, Jordan, Laos, New Zealand, Israel, Croatia, Saint Helena, Honduras, Romania, Taiwan, Liberia, Kyrgyzstan, Cape Verde, Barbados, and my friends in what’s left in the once proud UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. 

                           
                                I wish to welcome you down another road. Know I am merely a typist....

                                A place filled with potholes and nastiness, yet, a gentle spot to lay your head down, perhaps not feeling so nuts when something catches you off guard in a good way.

                        A Long Down a Short Pier, And Where It Led me....

                   Hope to see you there!
                    I now end this blog, thanking so many of you in my journey down the road....

                     I could not have reached this place without all of you!!!!
                     
                          From my now ever growing heart, so  much like the Grinch  a mere three years ago,  sizes too small,  learning to walk again via OtherNous, figuring things out about myself, limping, crawling, finding avenues of expression that might mate to others minds and grant them understanding and an element of peace.

                    I wish for each and everyone of us to find a place in gentle heart of understanding for all of us that share a precious gem, this being our Blue Marble.

                   Hugs to EACH AND EVERY FREAKING ONE OF YOU!!!!! YOU KEPT ALIVE BY YOUR VIEWING THIS, REPEATED READERSHIP, EMAILS AND SUCH!!!!! AS MY LIFE TOOK SO MUCH AWAY FROM ME, JESUS AND YOUR FELLOWSHIP ACROSS A GLOBE,  MADE ME REALIZE WHAT IS TRULY IMPORTANT. ALL OTHERS ARE VASTLY MORE IMPORTANT THAN OURSELVES....
                           WE ALL GOT STADIUM LOVE!
                                              STADIUM LOVE

                   
                        Kick your weekend into gear and share something beautiful and righteous for a change instead of telling how you got buggered off by another.

                              END OF LINE.....
                            MaY YoUr LiFe Be BlEsSed!
             MARK WILLIAM  DARUS 06122015
              

               

               
               
             

                 I

American Sniper: Story of Chris Kyle. by Mark William Darus. A movie was made about the life of one Chris Kyle, American Sniper. At the time of this writing I have neither read the book nor seen the movie. I am writing this now based on the profoundly stupid and sublimely idiotic viewpoints of those that would consider Snipers cowards of the highest order. Some would suggest these brave men and women, from safe distances shielded far away from immediate retaliation act as mere steely-knived murderers in a back alley way much like Jack the Ripper. Some might say they act as Rogue Elements of country gone insane, are merely 'kites' whose strings can cut, their beings sent adrift, disregarded and totally alone of support as when captured they are labeled spies. In the online game Battlefield 1942, I, more often than not have been a Sniper. When online while playing this, I would seek out the 'ONE' on the otherside that had the highest kill-rate and find ways to eliminate them. If they drove either a Panzer IV or a Sherman, upon resurrection, I would spawn back as someone with a bazooka to take them out. If they were an Engineer, I'd seek them out, hunt them down, and waste them as they fixed tanks and such. If they were, rarely so, a Medic, I'd waste them without a moments hesitation as they tried to help a team member in need. In short: I would find a way to eradicate any single profound threat to my team members. Yeah, so I am a video kid, Wargames Warrior that gets replays at every death and ill move I make and stroll down. Big fucking deal as I die! I merely get re-spawned to try things, waste the bad buys yet again. It's all so cool to do this as we are given a chance to learn from our mistakes. I've gone rounds where my Kill-Rate was 11 to 1 (that is to say I have killed 11 for every one of me.) to sometimes 30 to 1. I would often ask myself: How could I do this better and would push myself to do so from the comfy and cozy realm of a large screen monitor and 5-1 surround sound? Meanwhile, in the real/physical world we live in, Snipers, and I will always capitalize their title as I believe it to be as required as one might acknowledge that of a Doctor, are needed in modern conflicts. Why are Earth would I say such a thing as the above sentence? Mark, how could you possibly compare a cold hearted, stealthy, mile a way Killer and one that swore the Hypacratic Oath (sp?). This is easy for me to share. Here's why. Most doctors these days go toward private practices, specialties, if you will, to combat various ailments though directed points toward healing, more often than not, referring them to another Doctor. . Be it: Sports Medicine, Pain Management, Anorexia/Bulimia, Sleep Apnya (sp?), these selective physicians target and aide and do their best. Consider this: RED SECTOR NINER! crackles over headsets half a world away from our living rooms here in the USA. "Charlie Six is on the move!" A man/woman hunkered down in deep brush has a single target in their guns sights from a mile a way. Another team has Laze'd the area the main target the Sniper has acquired and is calling for a 30,000 foot high request to do a bombing run. A tiny moment passing: a voice goes over the wavelengths, "I've got this! Gimmie a moment, damn you! (deep inhale caught followed by report fired.: "It's done. Bombers stand down. That fucker's toast." The value of a gifted Sniper is to eliminate collateral damage and kill the ONE versus many others and live with the emotional fallout as you are responsible for covering people with the targets brain matter. I cannot imagine how one could balance this in their life successfully. Chris: I respect what you did for us as well as your work helping those Heros that were back in country. May you Rest in Peace and may your family have great lives. I wait to meet you as I earn my way toward the here after. -Mark William Darus

American Sniper: Story of Chris Kyle. My Thoughts on a Sniper.

American Sniper: Story of Chris Kyle. by Mark William Darus. A movie was made about the life of one Chris Kyle, American Sniper. At the time of this writing I have neither read the book nor seen the movie. I am writing this now based on the profoundly stupid and sublimely idiotic viewpoints of those that would consider Snipers cowards of the highest order. Some would suggest these brave men and women, from safe distances shielded far away from immediate retaliation act as mere steely-knived murderers in a back alley way much like Jack the Ripper. Some might say they act as Rogue Elements of country gone insane, are merely 'kites' whose strings can cut, their beings sent adrift, disregarded and totally alone of support as when captured they are labeled spies. In the online game Battlefield 1942, I, more often than not have been a Sniper. When online while playing this, I would seek out the 'ONE' on the otherside that had the highest kill-rate and find ways to eliminate them. If they drove either a Panzer IV or a Sherman, upon resurrection, I would spawn back as someone with a bazooka to take them out. If they were an Engineer, I'd seek them out, hunt them down, and waste them as they fixed tanks and such. If they were, rarely so, a Medic, I'd waste them without a moments hesitation as they tried to help a team member in need. In short: I would find a way to eradicate any single profound threat to my team members. Yeah, so I am a video kid, Wargames Warrior that gets replays at every death and ill move I make and stroll down. Big fucking deal as I die! I merely get re-spawned to try things, waste the bad buys yet again. It's all so cool to do this as we are given a chance to learn from our mistakes. I've gone rounds where my Kill-Rate was 11 to 1 (that is to say I have killed 11 for every one of me.) to sometimes 30 to 1. I would often ask myself: How could I do this better and would push myself to do so from the comfy and cozy realm of a large screen monitor and 5-1 surround sound? Meanwhile, in the real/physical world we live in, Snipers, and I will always capitalize their title as I believe it to be as required as one might acknowledge that of a Doctor, are needed in modern conflicts. Why are Earth would I say such a thing as the above sentence? Mark, how could you possibly compare a cold hearted, stealthy, mile a way Killer and one that swore the Hypacratic Oath (sp?). This is easy for me to share. Here's why. Most doctors these days go toward private practices, specialties, if you will, to combat various ailments though directed points toward healing, more often than not, referring them to another Doctor. . Be it: Sports Medicine, Pain Management, Anorexia/Bulimia, Sleep Apnya (sp?), these selective physicians target and aide and do their best. Consider this: RED SECTOR NINER! crackles over headsets half a world away from our living rooms here in the USA. "Charlie Six is on the move!" A man/woman hunkered down in deep brush has a single target in their guns sights from a mile a way. Another team has Laze'd the area the main target the Sniper has acquired and is calling for a 30,000 foot high request to do a bombing run. A tiny moment passing: a voice goes over the wavelengths, "I've got this! Gimmie a moment, damn you! (deep inhale caught followed by report fired.: "It's done. Bombers stand down. That fucker's toast." The value of a gifted Sniper is to eliminate collateral damage and kill the ONE versus many others and live with the emotional fallout as you are responsible for covering people with the targets brain matter. I cannot imagine how one could balance this in their life successfully. Chris: I respect what you did for us as well as your work helping those Heros that were back in country. May you Rest in Peace and may your family have great lives. I wait to meet you as I earn my way toward the here after. -Mark William Darus

Hmmm, Did Stephen King mean to write: E-bo-la, bumpity bumpity bumpity BUMP!

\;Welcome to The Real Stand.
;Mark William Darus.


;As the Ebola virus sweeps Africa, has landed in Texas with one in serious condition  after a botched ER visit and sent him home with weak antibiotics to infect others, and a hundred now in quarantine,  tell me how we will ever be told the truth when this infection spreads further?

                I think we won't. Why? Simply put: We as the USA are in the last financial quarter, Xmas spending just around the bend, and how many of us would really buy toys, candles and nicer things instead of necessities like water, food and thick garments for those we love and care about?

               Ebola has a twenty one incubation period....

              A man once said: "How many necks  can be sliced in a single night from one with a blade?" Multiply that with a sneeze, cough or a gunshot victim splashing blood  as an vastly underpaid EMS crew treat them on scene. (the Vastly underpaid reference goes toward an area oh so American in our value system, This being: Daycare/childcare workers Equal wages of Emergency Medical Service workers, those usually getting either United States Minimum Wage, that being under 9 dollars an hour versus we apparently as a Nation value much more worthy.

             We, as cities with Professional athletics teams wish to pay, albeit fight and fret for the right to pay one individual over ten million dollars a year just TO PLAY A FUCKING GAME?!?!

Wow, let's all cheer the player that caught a football, made a field goal, shot a three pointer or hit a game winning home run. Excuse me as they are vastly overpaid: BUT ISN'T THIS WHAT THEY ARE PAID TO DO??????!!!!! When was the last time you applauded your daycare workers for taking care of your children? Sure, you might Idly thank an EMS worker for saving a parent dying or even a child, but did you ever think for a Damned moment they should be paid much more than some idiot playing a game? A game! A game. What game do you wish to live your life in? Mark William Darus 10072014

Educational Videos on Psychopathy and recent Workplace Killings.

                                             

                                                                       Educational Videos
                                                                                 and some
                                                                                 Thoughts.
                                                                                       by
                                                                      Mark William Darus.

              Hi Everyone! Just thought I'd share some videos I found to be highly educational, but more importantly, incredibly useful and helpful.

              So, get your popcorn, wine and cheese or beer and sit back and watch.

The video below was created by Dr. James Fallon.
Discovering One's Hidden Psychopathy

Great tool here! Learn, please...
PSYCHOPATHS : IDENTIFYING THEM BEFORE YOU GET INVOLVED

Narcissists: This is an excellent video on the subject from a unique perspective.  (long vid, about 53 minutes, though well worth the watch.  (notice the song in the background. It's fitting.
The Narcissist: Psychology of Demons

                There's three videos for you to take in, digest and gather information for now. Individually, they are a lot to absorb, which is why I will only go with a few an entries at a time here.


                                                              AND NOW, THE NEWS!!!
                                              (well, sort of... I frankly believe there are so many things going on at this moment, globally speaking, that it is damn near impossible to focus on any one thing for more than a few minutes at a clip without mingling them all together like some word-soup of a Schizophrenic.                  Go figure, most human brain capacity  can only process information as such information passes thru filters of emotion: those being shock, panic, fear, elation, a sense of protection for self and loved ones. This flood of information will impede decision making in regards such simple things as grocery shopping, taking the family to eat at a restaurant to trick or treating this Halloween.

                  Hmmm, we have Ebola in Texas and over one hundred Americans quarantined, to Farrakhan suggesting that Ebola was created by the US Federal  Government to kill the black population and speaks about President Obama.
EBOLA: Minister Louis Farrakhan Claims Vaccines Responsible

                       Well, enough of that for now...  I will get back to those things later.

                          But for now, settle for these things to consider...
                 Here's my current thoughts over recent events:

                 Three workplace killings in a period of  11 days. T

                  The UPS Killings. Late September 2014.
                  3 people dead in Alabama UPS shooting

                  A workplace Beheading in Oklahoma: Late September, 2014
                   Beheading at work in Oklahoma, USA.

                   And this, October First in Alliance Ohio.
One dead following shooting at Alliance restaurant
                    The current findings on the above event.
Police: Fight over tip money may have led to deadly restaurant shooting

                     The Alliance Ohio event reminded me of this one which occurred less than two miles from me at a place I had eaten at many times before.
Ohio Cracker Barrel Shooting Leaves 3 Dead

                    Think and watch out for one another.
         MWD 10062014.


                 

Feel Free to Join us on Facebook.

                                               Facebook seems to be an avenue to reach many more.
                                                         There I can share many more videos
                                                                than I can on my blog.
                                                                         Mark William Darus


                  I don't think you have to be a member of this group to see the videos. Please send me an email if this is not true.
                    I simply wish for all of you to learn how not to be used and abused and maybe give you avenues for which to find recovery if your needs be.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/674377672637477/


Take care of you and yours,
Hugs from outer space,]
Mark

Scareyland : Thirty Six years ago this Summer: I became an Extrovert.

                               Thirty Six years ago this Summer: I became an Extrovert.
                                                                          by
                                                             Mark William DArus.

                    I loved to ten speed bike around with my friends. We did this nearly all year round, biking everywhere to see whatever there was to capture in our minds.

                    I was a recent 16 year old when I was accepted for a Methodist Camping trip that involved biking. A close friend of mine also tried for it but was somehow denied and caps were filled.  When I, accepted and him, denied, I told my folks I wanted to back out.

                   They said no, so off I went into what I perceived as 'ScareyLand'.

                   Scareyland should always  be looked at as a real place in anothers mind when dealing with exceptionally shy teenage boys and girls somehow seeking more or at least something different based on their unique abilities. Scareyland.

                    Often bullied in my youngest walkings to school, this, learning via my father how to stand for myself and fight back against them, I so remember an xmas  years long before this, that he bought he and I matching boxing gloves to teach me how to defend myself. In modern times, parents would be seeking lawyers. Fuck it, though, I think my fathers way was better. Let them hash it out.

                   Of those days boxing with dad in a cold and clamy basement, and on the other side I made pretty/fragrant candles in the very same area, he patiently softly punched my stomach, head and groin. Each time he connected, he told me how to defend against such jabs. We would go over it, time and again til I got it right.  Over and over he I and i would do this.

                    I, was like maybe nine then, when he taught me how to stand against bullies.  My Father was a Marine. When I asked him about his basic training, he'd go blank and tell me nothing.

                     In his footlocker I found, during a boring lonely summer day of my youth,  his Basic Training Marine Corps manuals. I was about 10 then. Frankly, I can see why he didn't show me this while we were boxing. I have little doubt I would have become a total killing freak after reading that piece of work. So, thanks FAther, and also to my Mother, for influence during that boxing time frame, teaching me, impressing on me other avenues avenues of defending oneself against an aggressor. My Mother would say: Mark: Physical confrontation only occurs when both sides have nothing further intelligent to say.

                         So, I learned how to stand to bullies and not give up my lunch money, the lunch my mother made for me with loving hands.

                        A lot can be said about physical desensitization

              Yes, during my elementary years, there were many. I'd end such confrontations after my dads lessons with perhaps a black eye, bloody nose and or fat lip, but I stood above their asses, saying to them : "You want mine! Really? Give me yours!"  and I'd look at thier brutes friends and say, "c'mon, you really want this?"

                         So I learned how to defend myself. That was most cool in the 1970's but even better nowadays. Wouldn't you agree that the teaching of 8 and older females children should not learn the value of pepper spray?

                         Think about it, really.... Take time and reread if needed.

                         ScareyLand goes yet sideways in most avenues of experience. When self and strangers are faced with one another for the first time.  This is a place of gathering like the worst of blind dates. A human mental collision of everything we hold sacred within ourselves

                        Imagine being thrust into a world of others as an introvert. 

     My parents took me to the place this Methodist Bike Camp would start.

           I felt so scared and frightened as they hug and kissed me goodbye, smiling and wishing me luck in my adventure for the next 7 days.

             Seven days away from everything I knew, enjoyed.

              What the fuck did I know about camping??? For fucks sake we never did that as a family.

              Sure. My sister Heidi and I would sometimes make a tent in the diningroom under a table near the air conditioner during the summer. 

                      I thought I was about to die as I met those I'd spend 7 days with. All of us were total strangers to each other.  

                      I met teens from Coshockton, Sandusky, Seville, Loudonville, Girard and about 2 other areas in Ohio.

                        When meeting, most of us looked like deer's in the headlights about to get run over.

                         The intro's were so awkward and sketchy as all us stumble with each telling a bit about themselves and where they are from/

                       Tossed into a world of strangers and....