Sunday, June 24, 2012

Ending this part of the BLOG I started: Final Phone interview.

                Final Interview: a predator, a healer: The Psychiatrist.


                 It may be months before I post others, yet I found this one most profound and disturbing.

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        Predator: Final interview
 

        General Information.

         Sex: Female

         Age: 48 (but I look about 30)

         Race: White, but most of time, very tanned

         Body Style: Athletic with natural tits that don’t droop.

          Highest level of education at the time of incident: Med School grad, field: Psychiatry.

          Location: AN: Would not give.

        Name: Alexis

<Advise caller their name is not needed as this is a blind survey. Their surveys will be assigned a random name for categorization purposes only>

 

 

 

 

 

        1. HAVE YOU ALWAYS BEEN THE SICK FUCKER OTHERS VIEW YOU AS BEING?

        Alexis: For as long as I can remember.

        2. WHEN DID YOU REALIZE YOU WERE DIFFERENT FROM OTHER PEOPLE?

       Alexis: about seven years of age, about the time I started having periods.

        3. DID THIS BOTHER YOU IN ANYWAY, AND IF SO, HOW?

        Alexis: I did not find this bothersome in the least bit. I found it different, that’s all. I knew people looked at me in a way they didn’t look at my sisters/brothers or friends of similar ages.

        4. AS YOU PROGRESSED IN LIFE, HOW DID YOU LEARN TO MANIPULATE OTHERS?

       Alexis: I would try and fail. Believe me, it was a truly wise person that said: “you will always learn more about life through failure than successes.” Sure, it’s applied psychology 101, but it only works if you learn from it. Most don’t, you know, and repeat the same routines over and over again in futility.

       5. WHEN DID YOU LEARN TO INTIMIDATE OTHERS?

       Alexis: 13.

        Mark: Care to elaborate?

        Alexis: Sure! I had a teacher in junior high that would keep staring at me. I didn’t feel creeped out or uncomfortable. I’d seen this kind of look before. Dad would give mom this look as I grew up. She’d smile and they’d disappear into their bedroom for a while. They’d be gone for about an hour, sometimes longer if mom was upset about something and dad had sensed it. They could read other like a movie you watch over and over again because you enjoy it so. He’d have a raw look of desire in his eye that he’d aim square at her. She responded most physically, sometimes blushing, mostly getting erect nipples. She’d-

        Mark: Sorry to cut you off/ You noticed her nipples getting hard? You noticed his eyes?

        Alexis: Yes. How odd is that for a girl of 13? But I always noticed things like that in people. Hell, I could even see the subtle differences in their breathing the closer they got to one another. At that point, they’d been married for over 20 years! Theirs was a love, that to this very day, I have never seen before with any couple. I miss my parents, I wished I’d found a partner like that had to each other.

          6. DID YOUR FAMILY KNOW WHAT WAS GOING ON WITH YOU?

         Alexis: My parents, yes. Siblings noticed nothing. My sisters and brother had their lives, friends and looks at life. Honestly, how many bros and sis’s notice anything about abnormalities in each other? My parents did though. They believed me too analytical for my age. Way too young for thoughts that delved into what makes people tick, what makes one ract this way while other respond this way. My dad was fond of saying, him being a highly educated dentist, she has a keen knowledge of fight or flight areas of human nature. She is most gifted.

         Mark: Did you feel yourself as gifted?

         Alexis: Not really, but it did tell me I was on to something.

          6a. DID THEY MAKE YOU SEEK HELP? AND IF UNDER 18, DID THEY FORCE YOU IN THIS REGARD?

        Alexis: Force, no. But they did say it would be in my best future to do so. They deeply loved me, all ego aside, perhaps more so than my sibs. They watched them extend, go beyond, grow normally. They saw a difference in me. They were both highly educated people, deep thinkers and secure in themselves to throw it out there and let the world deal with it.

<after a long silence, huge sigh and telling her dogs to behave and be quite>

       Alexis continued…

      Alexis: They asked me about venturing into counseling, telling me all the while they didn’t think anything was seriously wrong with me. I so loved them, but back when, I hated what they wanted me to do. I did it though. Through those interactions with a trained professional, I learned a massive amount of intel. I studied their reactions to my reactions, figuring those far less studied could both enchanted and beguiled by my answers and statements.

        Mark: Where did this knowledge take you?

       Alexis: To a land way beyond my lack of age, yet expanding wisdom. I learned to control strangers easily as your average person always give the crying child the benefit of the doubt.





       7. WERE YOU SEXUALLY, EMOTIONALLY ABUSED BY YOUR FAMILY WHILE GROWING UP?

Alexis: No, not at all.

 

 

 

        8. AS YOU SLIPPED INTO WHAT MADE YOU BECAME, DID IT HAPPEN SLOWLY OR FAST?

      Alexis: It was a way since birth with me. I just was this way. I have never had an age of realism without the factors I didn’t know then.

        9. AS IT OCCURRED, DID YOU HEAR VOICES, AN AUDIBLE SOUND LIKE THAT OF A CLOCK THAT MADE A SINGLE ‘CLICK’ OR ANYTHING THAT MADE YOU REALIZE YOU WERE CROSSING A TERMINATING POINT IN YOUR LIFE?

      Alexis: Nothing on this one.

       10. DID YOU SEE ANYTHING WHEN CROSSING THIS SUBCONCIOUS/MENTAL LINE? (if asked: what do you mean? counter them with probing questions: DID YOU SEE BELOVED GRANDPARENTS, AUNTS/ UNCLES, SIBLINGS FADING FROM YOUR MINDS EYE, DISAPEARING INTO A BLACK, DESOLATE BACKGROUND ? DID YOU SEE ANYTHING LIKE DEER RUNNING ACROSS A FREEWAY GETTING NAILED BY CARS OR TRUCKS. A CHILD FALLING FROM A FIFTH STORY BALCONY? WATCHING A BROWN FALL LEAF FALLING SLOWLY FROM A TREE IN HIGH WINTER OR SUMMER? (let them answer fully. Let them form their own answers with NO GUIDANCE or leading.)

        Alexis: I have no memories whatsoever of a past before then.

        11. WHEN DID YOU LOOK AT OTHER HUMANS AS BEING A LESSER FORM, OR AS SOME WOULD SAY “A SPECIES APART” FROM YOU?

      Alexis: Early, like 10. I didn’t manipulate my immediate family, but I did uncles and aunts. Christmas was always a grand spectacle, me getting better toys than their own kids. I opened up to them with my minds fiction and they’d feel sorry for me. From that point, I took neighbors for a long walk off a short pier.

        Mark: Were you proud of these things?

        Alexis: Pride had nothing to do with it. Pride is an emotion-based reflex to a reflection to ones self. I had no pride about this, but I did have a sense of power. This power grew and grew over the years and decades to follow.

        12. DID THIS KNOWLEDGE MAKE YOU MORE POWERFUL THAN OTHERS? AND IF SO, WHY?

        Alexis: Yes, vastly more superior. This is why I became a Psychiatrist. A gatekeeper for others to seek the truth inside their own minds and have me be in control the entire time. I helped others, granted: DO NO HARM, but I did and still use them to further my knowledge and studies.

       Mark: What studies would that be?

       Alexis: later, please continue.

 

       13. DO YOU LOOK AT HUMANS AS TOYS? <<<adding: AND I WON’T MAKE YOU GROVEL OVER THE CAT TOYING WITH THE MOUSE QUESTION>>>

         Alexis: Toys? No, not in the slightest. I did look at them as both sad and desperate people that longed for hope and those simply to be loved or understood by peers. I believed I failed many clients on this. It is truly impossible to teach others to look past the materialistic areas/ values and have them expect their friends to do the same.

        14. ARE YOU PERSONALLY SUCCESFUL WITH MANIPULATING, INTIMIDATING AND USING OTHERS FOR YOUR GAIN?

          Alexis: definitely so. I have written five books in the realm of psychology and will continue to treat people and write about it.

       15. DID YOU GET MARRIED AND IF SO, WHY?

         Alexis: Yes, to wonderful man that even in my pathological lying knew the truth about me. He won’t admit it, but he like me.

       Mark: and what is that?

        Alexis: A nonviolent psychopath. You should see what he does to companies. How much money he gains manipulating business owners, share holders and unions. He won’t say it, but he is my twin. I cannot say more about this man I share life with.

       16. IF BEING MARRIED, WHY DID YOU CHOSE THIS PERSON? IF HAVING CHILDREN WITH THIS SPOUSE, WHAT WOULD YOU TEACH YOUR CHILDREN?

       Alexis: Had no kids. Why did I chose him? Well, he was like me in male form. Made sense, logically and physically speaking. We seemed to know each other from day-one. We had a rhythm, similar stride or dance with each step given us. Marriage, either made in heaven or ascended from hell, you decide. This man is mine, and I would kill for him.

          17. ARE YOU CONTENT WITH YOUR LIFE AT THIS POINT?

        Alexis: I would not give this life in trade for Gates cash or any of the Hiltons-dumb ass chicks disbrain endeavors.

       18. IF NOT CONTENT, DO YOU THINK YOUR HUNGER WILL EVER SUBSIDE?

       Alexis: I am content and as long as I have a license, I will never hunger deeply so.

       19. DID YOU FIND PSYCHOPATHY: ANOTHER LIFE HELPFUL IN ANYWAY?:

        Alexis: Mark, you have no idea how much this has meant to me. You, without shame, kept this blog running while placing your full name to it. I have shared emails with you to the point I believe your aim is true. We have been Facebook friends for a few months now. I have followed your writings since we met. <she chuckles, saying, I know you will give me a good name.

         Mark: like everyone else. I give you a name I find appropriate.

      Alexis: controlling bastard! <laughing>

        Mark: and what else would you expect?

        Alexis: just let me co-write your book with you.

        Mark: We’ll see, Alexis.

        Alexis: I hope you do. Love you!

        Mark: No, Alexis. You can’t. But we will write a book together.

         Alexis: Mark, do you think you and I can find what is truly human? I am willing to try and my man says I should with you.

         Mark: What harm would there be in trying?

         Alexis: None. I will call you..

          AN: and she did. We talked for hours, about 8 with various recharges to sustain this conversation. We still talk, she has become my Comrade. And we have been FaceBook friends for months, half a world apart with similar interests. Mentally Joined. Sharing thoughts through emails and phone calls. Hugging each other as we'd embrace ourselves.

       Fantasy? Well, that depends on how you view your world around you and spirituallity. It's not like we have phone sex...

 

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      This was the final phone interview I would post on the subject of NVP’s until a later reprise comes forth.

       Why is this?

          I found this to be a vastly more poignant interview as many deal with mental help professionals and never wonder why they choose to do such things for an income. How many times does a person look at an engine specialist as to why he chose to work on internal combustion engines versus brain surgery? And while we’re at it, why should a Certified Auto Mechanic be paid less than that of a medical professional? These highly trained people do for your mode of transportation, getting to work, getting kids to places, aide you in that illicit affair and charge must less than medical doctors. You give the grease monkeys flack. Try giving your doctor flack and see how far that takes you.

        Yeah, this is a major shout-out to Dave, Mike and their band of Brothers at Midas!

        Thanks to all for the Phone interviews. In time, I will place all of them here.

      I must move to the next area of study.



        Mark William Darus 06-24-2012



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