Monday, October 1, 2012

25 years of marriage. To my Bestest Friends. A Celebration.

                         An anniversary after 25 years of marriage.
                                      By Mark William Darus.



      Such a wondrous event I witnessed today. My best and friend, dare I say, Brother, renewed his vows of marriage with his beautiful wife after 25 years together. His loving family put this grand event together for them.


      I was so touched to be there. It was so nice to see smiles from so many, tears of joy, to once again hear the sound of laughter so spontaneous and sincere that didn’t occur from a totally human accident. I am blessed to have these this wonderful family in my life.


                        I would’ve committed suicide two decades ago if it hadn’t been for them freely taking me into their lives and giving me a gentle place to be.

      To my Bestest (“Bestest” is an intentional misspelling. Sometimes, this expresses more than the proper,) friend of over 35 years, I cannot say enough about you. You’ve always accepted me and my odd ideas, bizarre way of living and my absurd thoughts. You are my Brother. Over the years, we’ve shared so very much. We’ve rebuilt engines, made a pool after leveling your yard <that your neighbors tree took out weeks later> , and witnessed your wife getting shocked with a vacuum cleaner and the pool. You’ve been with me through the best and worst of times of my life. In over 35 years, he and I had one single disagreement, but sharing a loyalty like nothing I have ever known, it was soon disregarded. He and I also saw the passing of Dale Earnhardt Sr that day at Daytona. I so vividly remember the shocked looks that passed between us.


       To his wonderful wife. A truly amazing woman in all regards. Many is the time she fed me, and still does. A devout Star Wars fan, she always put up with my beliefs on the series and how my thoughts made her furious with me. Oh yeah, she’d storm away from me with eyes aflame with unbridled anger. Seriously, I sincerely believe I pushed this woman’s patience to the brink and sometimes beyond. I find it totally amazing I did not get banned from their house. At her daughters birthday party so long ago, she trusted me to video tape it. OH MY GOD, what I did with their camcorder was horrendous! I constantly inverted it, spiraled the images and thoroughly pissed her off! C, I in all honesty don’t know how you put up with me over the many years. You are a woman way above most!

       What can I say further about them?

       Well, after all, I a wordy man and can write about almost anything, so here goes

                                        25 years of marriage.

           Such a monumental landmark in a day and age when most things are totally disposable and replaced. Friends in relation to our lives come and go so fleetingly. With job changes, tiny disagreements and the smallest of perceived slights, many blow us off with increasing regularity that barely a blur passes in their wake. The times we live in people so easily fall for the bullshit of instant happiness, lack of boredom and the desire of illusionary greener pastures that breed the shallowest of temporary contentment. So completely deceived by weak desires and what we’re missing fueled by mass media commercials and divorce attorneys, people get lost and, well, become stupid.

             I am so grateful you two are not a member of this ever growing community of long lasting depression and the using of others as human-bandages to cut the pain created from hastily made bad decisions.

            Well, I’m not a statistician. I have no clue what that Quarterback did over time, or a pitcher did in his career or that basketball players history. I’ve always found those memory filling things to be most worthless, like taking a millionth step into a pile of dog shit or the importance of having yet another case of the flu at fifty years of age.

             I do know this: You two are the only people, I personally know that have that have:

Never been divorced at any point in your lives.

You’ve been together in marriage for:

9125 days

219,000 hours

13,140,000 minutes

788,400,000 seconds

            This is an amazing, huge testimonial of perseverance, loyalty and love. You both maintain the best parts of the words so freely said by so many others yet lacking any meaning, truth or sincerity: For richer or poorer, through sickness and in health, to death do you part. <<<now granted, that last part (the death do us part thing I totally disagree with. If the bond of the two is true and everlasting, is there really a parting?) I don’t think so. At least not in the emotional sense.>>>

           Today, I saw an anniversary given and witnessed by family and friends of my Bestest friends. Such emotions so positive, enriching and most high in energy and love filling the hall that surrounded me with their glory and communion. We broke bread, laughter and the lightest of hearts I haven’t seen in a group setting in decades without alcohol filling most in presence.

           Good god, smiles so real and touching their eyes. Happy sounds of comments freely spoken during their ‘roasting’ spoken, with photos, by their family members. The scent of candles and food made with tender hands and contented hearts.

         I bow my head to you both, tears wanting to well up in me, Dave and Cindi: You are my BESTEST friends and congratulations!

          Your anniversary taught me the best in an area I have sought for years.

          Thanks to you and your children.

         You have taught me, from my being blessed by knowing you, what truly is being human.

             Dave and Cindi, may God always shine you on. Through stormy clouds yet holding the brighest of beams for you both to embrace the warmth of each others arms eternal, yours is a love most true.

Mark William Darus 09302012