Thursday, April 26, 2012

Myths, Folktales and The Evil Closest Monster

               Myths, folktales and The Evil Closet Monster.

                 PART I:  Let the hunt begin! Tallyho!



It is most easy to spot a Nonviolent Psychopath (NV-P) in a crowd of people. Go to any crowded grocery story, hopefully with 100 people or more shopping. I say a hundred or more based on the statistic that 4% of the population of the USA are psychopaths, so it should be easier for you to spot one, perhaps two. It could also be at your local Hardware store, ( guys so fall to predators at hardware stores. Must have something to do with the word Hard, in hardware.)



PART I: Out of place dude at the grocery store.

You’ve seen them and maybe thought them odd. One thing is for sure: they stand out in the crowd.

The males are the ones with near empty grocery carts, staring blankly at frozen peas, looking over their shoulders periodically to see what hottie will fall into their web. They wait so patiently like a spider that the unsuspecting fly has no clue they are even thinking anything gross or disgusting.

“Are these good frozen peas?” they may say.

“My god! There’s too many to choose from???”

“What they Hell does Orgasmic Product of the US mean?”

This quite frequently gets the woman feeling sorry for this poor schlep of a man. They smile at his poor reading abilities, “I think that says ‘Organic’…”

“Uh, sorry…” he says faking an embarrassed look. “my sick mother asked me to pick her up some peas. Christ, I didn’t know there were this many.”

“Poor baby, lost in the woods, eh?” she says, feeling a tug at her heart as this man is so frustrated trying to help his mother.

“yeah, I’ve been that way since my died two years ago. She was, (sniff sniff) hit by a bus.” He smiles, with a small, though tooth showing, expression.

“ sorry to hear that, let me help you.” She’s getting closer and closer to the sticky web he’s cast. <Okay, fine, I know how Freudian that sounds. J I couldn’t resist.>

What this woman that happened on the frozen peas section of doom didn’t see were the simple telltale signs he displayed.

And after you read this section, you will know them and not end up like her.





PART II: The ACMECOYOTE Hardware MEGA Store! She has the non-sugar walls you need to avoid.

 

There is this women looking bewildered, though exceptionally gorgeous, standing in front of the circular saws. Every time a store employee asks if she needs assistance, she waves them off with a sultry voice stating she’s only looking.

Enter macho man. This guy is dressed like he walked out of high school shop class. A Harley Davidson T-shirt that reads: RIDE HARD! STAY HARD! that is way too small and too tight, showing off his manly arms and bulging chest. His slightly torn Levi’s, which also happen to be two sizes too small, advertising that he really is sporting a cucumber down there.

Macho dude strolls with a swagger. He walks up to this blond babe wearing flowing brightly colored skirt and oh so tight and pink jog bra. There is a cockiness to his walk, he truly must be a woman's man, no time for talk.

Her hot pink jog bra nailed him like the outside wall at Talladega repeatedly trashes Nascar drivers at 200 miles per hour.

Watching him, his eyes locked on her twin peaks, that the jog bra do not hide, he is clearly thinking one thing. “ooga-chocka! Ooga ooga ooga-chocka, oogo ooga_ I just get this feelin’. deep inside of me…”

He’s sporting a voice like Marvin Gaye with the look of Peewee Herman riding his face as he begins to speak.

“Say, fine lady, you look lost and I’ve got your road map.”

She smiles, mouth opening halfway. Green eyes shining like polished emeralds.

“ I just don’t know which drill to pick out for my father. He’s dying of cancer and I want to get him the best one ever! You see, he wants to make his own coffin as to not burden my brothers and I with the cost of a real one.” her voice falters, eyes dropping to floor.

“Darlin’, these are saws. But any sweet thing could make this mistake. Let me show you.”

He walks her to the power drill area.

She looks at the stock before her, than, looks at his ‘stock’ and says; “so BIG! I just don’t know which to choose.”

“uh, darlin, I can help you this. I know a lot about tools” he so manly states, reaching to scratch his groin like a pro baseball player.

She’s got him now, and damn well knows it!

Yet, how did this obvious man of the world lose control and slam into her wall? <damn, the Freudian lines just keep on coming… J >

We’ll get to the so to easy to read signs soon enough.


_____________________________________________________________________________________

 

What did part one and part two have in common?

Well, besides the obvious stupidity in the places they chose to prey, we missed much.

The half-smiles.

Had they smiled fully, the victim would’ve surely run away when they saw the massive k-9s that only a true predator can possess. Sharp fangs, pointy pointy teeth, as Monty Python so gave warnings of such things that most fail to heed.

Eyes, that may contain colour, but hold pupils as black as the pits of hell.

Other tells: When encountering anyone (especially a man) with a shopping cart that contains the following: One pack of Jimmy Deans pure pork sausage (not pre-cooked), a loaf of cheap bread, (note this: no cold-cuts or peanut butter and jelly), a pack of corned beef, (again, refer to the bread. Not rye and no cheese to compliment this) NO MUSTARD! Two boxes of Captain Crunch cereal (and no Milk), a butchers knife, a box of latex gloves, six packs of JuicyFruit gum and a cheap-ass apron.

Oh yeah, you’re what’s for dinner?

When encountering the hardware chick.

You will buy her the drill and drill bits. You’ll even have her get, and you will pay for these, the largest damn bits there is. You’ll even suggest that she get the heaviest leather tool belt they offer that gives her the most protection.



These people will kill you without giving it a moments thought!

Look at it: Latex gloves? Pork Sausage? Biggest drill bits?

So easy to figure out.

Pork sausage indicates that they are not Jewish, and perhaps maybe Nazi in background. Coupled with the butchers knife, apron and JuicyFruit gum. Juicy fruit, to cleanse their pallet after they have Hannibal Leture’d your ass, apron to dispose of as they slash you to bits with the butchers knife.

Take the time and think about it for a moment.

As far as the Fever Nights guy at the hardware extravaganza.

Well, this is easy to describe. Ever seen the movie Driller Killer? N’uff said.

Predators have flaming eyes, usually burning red with hells fire. Female Predators have flowing hair and come-fuck-me smiles and always wear flowing skirts and too revealing tops. Male predators come off like Bundy’s, acting like a dork with an attachment, like Norman Bates, to their mothers.

They all wear clothes that are out of date, have bad breath and torn fingernails. They talk like no one you ever heard before and they know how to steal your heart, soul and thoughts in milliseconds with a mere sucking in of your air.

They drive good cars, fast crotch rockets, or have a plane waiting.

They are all in league with the devil.

Welcome to the myths , folktales and Closet Monster.

From sheer sight, you cannot spot a NV-P on sight. You cannot pick them out of a crowd as one might find a bad pear in a rack with squeezing it first.

They do not have massive fangs, stares like that of Manson or Lecture, and will not use a butchers knife on you.

Homicidal Psychopaths are easier to find, perhaps using the above guidelines.

Read about Andrei Chikatilo (USSR) and his methods for further understanding. The investigator on him had him nailed years before, but got blocked by USSR parties bullshit before the walls fell. At that point, he NAILED fucker after a nervous breakdown while working the case and being accused of both madness and distortion of evidence. Movie to watch: Citizen X. Starring Donald Sutherland, Stephen Rae, Max Von Sydow . Fantastic movie! Thanks to best brother Dave Rose for showing me this years ago!

The NV-P is a casual beast that walk amongst us. They look and act like you and your friends. Though there are tells mentioned in previous posts from others and myself on my BLOG, most go without further thought to the reader. They do not carry themselves as monsters and only give to others their true selves as they leave.

Well, how do you know who is a NV-P and how isn’t?

Well, do like the styles of olde. Throw some weight on their ankles and toss them in a river. If the sink, they must be evil as wood and ducks floats and evil doesn’t. Put them on a Polygraph. Surely NV-P’s cannot pass those. They are such loathsome and emotionless characters that they could not possibly pass questions regarding emotion and remorse. Keep in mind, most covert-ops have been trained, like most members of the military, can pass those and have given their tricks for doing these so freely to the point they can be found in both books and movies, as well as the Internet.



In conclusion: They are not so easy to spot. There are, however things/actions to look for as mentioned in previous posts to look for. These came from both sides of my BLOG, the that filled their mental/ego bellies and those that were gutted both emotionally and financially.

Thanks for reading. I truly enjoyed writing this installment.

The commercials were from my mind and mine alone. All rights reserved. Implied copyright: 03:30AM on 04/26/2012 EST.

God help us, but if we do go into a Soylent Green mentality, I can handle the advertising for it with no problem whatsoever. Maybe god help me? I laugh, but you, reader, decide that for yourself.

Yours in thought, word, and most of all, writing and bowling!



Mark William Darus.

1 comment:

  1. William, what about the Closet Monster? Maybe in Part II?
    Thugs-4-Plugs?!?!?! Fucking hillarious!!!

    ReplyDelete